Randomization- Why imprison your mind?

I try alot of things...

2009-07-12T18:41:00.002+08:00

Singing, writing, poetry, computer art, photography... etc etc

But what am I really good at?

Lots of time to discover, too bad cameras are banned in army camps or I'd have a ball. =D

(And I wish I could bring my iPod in too.)

Speaking of wishes... Why can't human hair grow faster?

Back from Training to be a Soldier

2009-07-04T20:33:00.004+08:00

Ha. I'm planning on reviving this place, but I can't think of much to write. For now I'll do a short one.

Basically I've completed BMT. I'm now a private and I'm in a trade course now. Learning about the SSPH-1, aka the Singapore Self propelled Howitzer or the Primus. It has its own wiki page, go read about it if you're interested in war vehicles. XD I'm in the 3rd Division, 21st Batallion Singapore Artillery, Charlie Battery, Syndicate 2.

I was supposed to be a gunner assistant, which is also an artillery vocation, but there was some kind of manpower transfer and now I'm in Kranji camp II. (Its very near to Clementi, so I'm happy in that respect too.)

One phrase to describe my new job scope: "Arty arty arty!"

All the cows in New Zealand better watch out. ;)

Life in my new unit is fun so far. The discipline is quite strict but the course is very very interesting and a good 90% or so of the people there are quite lively and fun to be with. The sergeants are fantastic people generally, and they do discipline us sometimes although its often for a good reason. And they're enjoyable folk and fun to talk to.

Ok, so what's happened since I started NS?

1) Bought a new iPod (Its purple. >_<>pay allowance.)

2) Started singing alot more. (I'm taking part in my unit's Talentime. Don't ask, I was sort of arrowed.)

3) Started listening to a whole lot more music. (Thank the iPod.)

4) Learnt how to use various army equipment.

5) Touched things THAT CAN KILL!!! (Technically a knife can kill too, and so can a bottle of floor cleaner, but you get what I mean.)

6) Botak. =/ I think I looked better with long hair but the bald look isn't completely horrible on me either, so I don't mind.

7) Did my first pullup! And following that, many many more came. (A few at a time, of course.) Now I'm stuck at 5 pullups though and you need 6 to pass IPPT. That and my standing broad jump score is horrible. Other than that I can pass, yay.

8) Lost my phone, got a new one that actually displays the names of people who SMS instead of just their numbers.

That's about it... I don't think a soldier's life is very interesting. There's not alot to blog about, and the bulk of worthy material is classified apparently. Aww.

Hai.

2009-02-18T18:55:00.002+08:00

Work is getting quite horrible. =/

Basically what I've been complaining about, except I feel that its getting worse and worse.

The good news is, I'll be out of it in a few days.

The bad news is, my NS enlistment date is coming soon. XD

2 years ain't that long. Hopefully time will pass quickly... It seems sad that my teenage years are gonna burn away soon though. D= I'll seriously miss being below 20.

Omg...

2009-02-07T14:35:00.002+08:00

This week was so hectic. Working in a childcare center is so stressful, cos you have to keep your eye on the kids all the time. Even if they get a little cut or what, it has the potential to turn horribly nasty and it can get you into trouble... And I don't mean an infection. Not to mention when there are like 9 of them in a class and they all ask for the teacher at the same time. Even with two teachers its nearly impossible to cope... Ugh. Its totally not like school where like, the students come to the teacher and the questions are done generally... You have to attend to each of them and its totally like a 9x individual tuition rather than a group tuition with 9 people... Hai.

Not to mention some are quite naughty... There's alot I could elaborate on here, but I don't really want to. >_< There are some good students, though. Like some of them bought Teacher Sasi a drink and they even walked a little further to get it to her at a cheaper price, which I found very cute. XD

But my boss is ok. Her name is Pauline and I guess she's quite understanding I guess. My colleague (actually she's like, way more experienced than me) called Sasi has been very very very very very helpful, helping to supervise with lessons and showing me the ropes. Without her I would've died already, probably literally. -_- And the chef/cleaner aunties called Zainab (I think) and He Li are very nice and polite, its good to chat with them sometimes.

I always come early for work to photocopy worksheets for my tuition classes (Monday-English, Tuesday-Maths, Saturday-Creative Writing) but everyday there's usually something that prevents me from using the copier... Either some technical problem or someone else is using it. But I manage to get by by staying back and photocopying or with Teacher Sasi's help, lol. I've grown to hate photocopying. =D

And also alot of parents have been giving feedback... They said that I gave questions that are too easy and also that I photocopied the worksheets untidily... I hope next week is better. And I honestly can't wait for the 20th... Being a primary school level tuition and childcare teacher is horrible... At least for me. Its extremely taxing; physically, mentally, emotionally. I guess that's how most jobs are like.

Childcare

2009-02-05T15:38:00.002+08:00

My job is super tiring. XD

Have to look after kids for 5 hours. The good part is when they're playing. Can play Uno with them and they're quite cute. Noisy but bearable. I like the P1 and P2 kids, they're so adorable and comparatively well-behaved when you look at the P3 and P4s, who are quite rowdy. And there's this very rude boy. But ya... nevermind.

The bad part is when you have lessons and five of them ask questions at the same time. Even with 2 teachers its difficult to answer 9 students' individual questions. And the chorus of 'Teacher teacher!' makes me feel very stressed. =/

And also I have to do admin work sometimes, like photocopying worksheets and sorting them. Its rare that I have to do that though, but I hate it to the core. Its tiring both physically and mentally... (You have to lug Geog-sized files around and also sort them by level. And my Geog files were huge, mind you. Those big ring folder type. D=)

And alot of them commented on my acne. -_- But I guess they're just kids, can't expect them to be tactful... Its started peeling off already, like scabs. I think it'll look better after its done... Sorry if that made you feel disgusted. But I hope my face gets better. I'm bloody sick and tired of hearing relatives' commenting on it. Especially my mum... She won't stop telling everyone and reminding me that my face looks so horrible. Jeez.

Anyway, right now I'm considering if I should go gym or stay at home and slack until 11 or 11.30pm.

Simple life, I guess. Monotonous and quite boring also... Stupid A level results, why can't they come sooner? Cliffhang me lor. Grr.

Job extension

2009-02-02T20:38:00.002+08:00

Remember my last post? More specifically, when I said I now work in a tuition center?

I was offered a job at that same place from the 3rd of Feb to the 20th, only on weekdays though. 9am to 2pm, I'll be looking after kids. Doing stuff like art, writing and helping with their homework. And just taking care of them in general. It sounds a little like a job I can't handle (In my opinion anyway) but I'll try my best and hopefully nobody will... Okay better not say, its Chinese New Year. ;)

Oh and also those two remaining creative writing lessons. The Math lesson tomorrow is considered within my new job timing. I'll have to teach more students Math. Yay. -_-

I deliberately wanted to keep my late afternoons/evenings free so I could go jog and go gym. And use the computer, of course!!

I hope I don't regret taking this job up. XD

Today I did nothing much. I played an MMORPG called Perfect World. I stayed at home. I didn't exercise. I'm going to have to go to bed soon because of work tomorrow. D= Goodnight!

After a long long time

2009-02-01T14:06:00.003+08:00

Haha, thanks Geetha, Radiah, Nicholas, etc etc for forcing me to blog again. -_- And I think Mark/Ben also? Can't remember but basically alot of people who went like "Omg your blog died."

Okay ya.

So now, I'm slightly fitter. I can jog (jog ah, not sprint...) about 5km now without stopping/walking at all, but the pace leaves something to be desired. XD My timing sucks la basically. But still, greater endurance is always good. >_> And also I feel more fit. I think I'm healthier. And stuff. Have been taking less meat and more veggies and fruits. I feel alot better about life and myself in general, I guess. And no I'm not dieting, I'm just cutting down on my excess meat and candy consumption. I'm actually quite happy with my weight, I think I'm 57-59kg (it fluctuates quite abit) and 170cm. Its a good height-weight ratio. ;)

Yeah and I got a job. =D I'm teaching kids at a tuition center. Pay isn't that good for tuition but I guess you can't be picky if you're a student waiting for your A level results in the midst of an economic crisis... Tsk. Each lesson is one and a half hours in the mornings. Creative Writing on Saturdays, Maths on Fridays. One Maths lesson left, and two for creative writing, then I'll get my pay and I can stop working there. Its actually not a bad place to work, the kids are alright, quite well behaved if not restless and somewhat hyper. But they are very hardworking, especially the two girls who I tutor for Maths. They don't even want any breaks in their lesson and they keep asking me for more work... ._.

And I got new glasses. Its the thick thick black army kind. I think I look better in them actually, more mature or whatever shit. -_- Oh and my acne got worse, but now its getting better. I think. Its peeling off. Sorry if that was disgusting but its a good sign that its healing. It looks utterly horrible when its peeling though, almost everyone commented on it and I'm quite unafraid to admit so myself. But things can only get better, acne-wise at least.

In the end I didn't dye my hair, and its too late to do that now cos I'm going to NS in about a month and a half, so yeah. No point dyeing after so long. Its still black. And its very long. By my standards anyway, my hair has never been that long... I also have a fresh appreciation for black hair now. ;) Ever notice how it shines so lustrously under strong lighting? You don't get that with other colours, or at least not to that extent unless its treated somehow or something. Now I sound like a bloody bimbo so I'm gonna stop. Oh but before that, I plan to grow my hair until I have to shave semi-botak for NS. Let's see how long it can get. XD

Yep and I went to karaoke yesterday. Before that we had Pepper lunch at IMM. Saw Geetha, her hair seems longer now. And its so curly. XD And she has no acne, grr. =P Took photos which I'll send Geetha later, then you can go to her blog and see I guess. I look quite effeminate in them. -_-

Yep then karaoke. I think my singing is better now. I can't handle very high or very low notes, though. But I think I'm quite nice to listen to...? I hope so, haha. If not this will all be empty self-praise. And mind you I've been practicing quite alot at home (hours and hours), if I didn't improve its quite sad. But am a little soft sometimes, and other times my voice quavers cos of nervousness or breathlessness, and my breathing could still use some work. I learnt how to stomach-breathe but I find it unnatural still. But there's time to change that. XD I learnt that Qingpei, Wenjie and Radiah all have their different styles of singing. Radiah's is very emotional and high, Qingpei's is pretty similar. Wenjie's fluctuates alot. O_o But all three have great voices, they've been singing for way longer than me. Mine is probably like middle-range in terms of the deepness/highness and less emotional... I need to work on that too, its very hard for me to fake out emotions so they have to be genuine to carry over into the song. Blah blah rant about singing.

And then I had Japanese food again for dinner. Unagi+Tamago= Unatama I think. With sticky Japanese rice which I love alot. It was pretty tasty for a dinner but also expensive. But that's Orchard Road for you. And we went somewhere which I don't wish to talk about here.

Haha, a photo. With me inside. =O Isn't that amazing? I'm posting my own photo. Omg. And so on. Yes I look quite... noob. XD I'm the guy with the acne, the red shirt and the thick black glasses (not Wenjie who has white glasses). And my hair is kinda bad. Improvement over centerparting but whatever. And I smiled too much but anyway I don't care for that. Okay. XD Done. That wasn't so hard! (Blogging, I mean. Posting my photo was hard. >_>)

Whatever changes

2008-12-09T19:36:00.004+08:00

Finally I have something to blog about... Its actually quite trivial... But I'll spill my innermost bleh.

Initially I wanted to train for NS after 'A' levels... Then I realised that even with training (which is actually quite slack, usually involves jogging a 2.4 and a few km of walking only, but hey, you gotta start somewhere...) I have quite alot of free time...

But I don't feel like gaming. I don't know why but nowadays I only feel like using the computer for MSN... There's no more drive to game at all, even after A levels. No FT, no Spore, no lousy flash games even...

Yeah but I did do some silly stuff since A levels ended til now...

1) Learnt how to sing in front of more than one person at a time (and went to karaoke twice)... Still need voice projection lessons but at least I can sing already... Its always been one of my deepest fears so I guess I conquered it? Yay. -___- No really, last time if you can even get me to hum something its quite an achievement already...

2) I tried alcohol. XD And I love it... The burning sensation on your face after drinking is fantastic. Its only some 4.8% noob stuff la but you have to start somewhere... It tastes bitter but is overwhelmingly 'spicy' and gassy too but its the sensation of it rather than the taste that's nice. Barcadi Breezer or whatever, forgot how you spell it. No I didn't get drunk... I just 'drank' one a few minutes ago and I feel ok, just a little hot. -_- I think if you can get dead drunk on a 4.8% its quite sad I guess...

3) I went to a chalet. Two actually... One class chalet and one for Arthur's birthday (which I just came back from a few hours ago...) I hate sleeping in outing clothes... But whatever, staying up is very fun. XD

4) Learnt how to play mahjong. Only 4 rounds but I won the first one (really out of beginner's luck though. -_-) and I'm definitely far from knowing the full set of rules, but I get the gist now. Sort of? I also learnt how to play a few more card games...

5) I styled my hair ahahhaha. -_- For prom la, it looked okay but I wasn't the one who did it. =/ I tried it myself and failed miserably. But nevermind... Actually I did it before for class photos but oh well. And it wasn't me who did it, of course...

Now I'm contemplating if I should go dye my hair and/or get a job... Its like some switch was turned off after 'A' levels ended, and I'm doing stuff on my post A's bucket list. Hehe its very fun, I feel so alive! And I want to go Kbox again...

P.S. Went to Tanjong Pagar/Bugis with Radiah to walk around and visit the library. Posting photos soon.

Post A levels...

2008-11-21T09:58:00.004+08:00

No, it doesn't feel very happy. There's too much stuff to worry about...

Chalet, prom and someone's birthday. Actually more than one person. =/ Then next year... Ya. But for now, prom is the biggest worry. I'll probably end up looking like a fool that night. =(

(This is a secret ploy to garner your pity so that you'll go out and buy clothes with me. =D No la don't, unless you really want to. I definitely can't go alone though, I couldn't know less about clothes shopping...)

I'd rather go back to school. I'm starting to miss everything about it already. Seriously...

Oh but yesterday was fun. First time I went KBox and purposely sang in front of more than one person. =/ I nearly died of nervousness la, at the start but then dunno why towards the end I suddenly felt very high... Probably cos of Wenjie. -_- Singing is quite fun actually, but I went home and my lips felt horrible, like someone pulled them apart or what... I want to go Kbox again. XD But apparently I sang very soft? That was at the start la, towards the end I thought it was quite loud.

I want to learn how to project my voice, seriously. I'm tired of talking so softly and stuff. Anyone can teach? Don't tell me silly stuff like 'focus on your stomach' or what. Might as well tell someone who's taking an English exam to 'focus on the alphabet'. Very useful... But alot of people have told me weird things like that, or they'll say "How to teach? O_o", so I wonder if projecting your voice is just an innate thing, like maybe rolling your tongue or something. Ok I know rolling your tongue is exclusive to some people who have favourable genotypes but whatever. Can't think of a better example...

Singing is such a beautiful thing, and I really envy those with the talent, especially those who can sing in a very emotional way... Its like making music with nothing but your vocal chords.

Happy Birthday to AA flows

2008-11-03T18:34:00.003+08:00

Yes, hiatus. Broken temporarily because today is the day that was responsible for spawning me. Aren't you happy? Say yes, say yes. Even if you are lying...

(No, don't spam my tagboard with 'yes'. I will keel you.)

Best birthday ever, even though it was slightly depressing... Brought to you by, the letter 'A'... (Watch some Sesame street if you don't get it.)

Thanks for the muffin (which I ate already) and the book. =) I didn't expect a surprise party, considering the circumstances... And here's a special thanks to all the well-wishers, especially Wenjie and Vivian who sent SMSes at 12 mn on the dot, lol. At least more people remembered this year, quite good considering the *unique circumstances* associated with 3rd November 2008. Even Hermes SMSed me. -_-

GP was ok, but harder than expected. I tried different things, deviating from my usual style of writing slightly. Hope it works out. I'm rather confident though, but it may be the birthday thing. I feel quite energized and optimistic today...

Geog sucks... For once, prelim was much easier than the actual... Zomg, Cambridge setters can be so cruel... Hopefully moderation will work in our favour. Oh and, for the record, fieldwork technique questions suck. If you feel pessimistic on a good day like today, then you know something's majorly wrong... D=<

Sorry, no mood to write about anything else.

Ok except this, so that you can scoff or pity me or whatever:
Now must study Maths, what type of birthday is this? -___- At least the paper is at 2pm tomorrow and I have more time for revision, so yeah... And can wake up later, I LOATHE waking up at 6am... Oh well, at least the first day (the one with the shitload of papers) is over already... The rest of the days are single-paper days for me. After tomorrow I'll probably be elated beyond words, since Maths Paper 1 is my wolfsbane and Achilles heel. Its a pain in the cleavage furrow.

What a paradox. (GP pun intended...) Its the start of A levels and I feel happier than ever. I think.

Last post before 'A' levels

2008-10-18T11:08:00.002+08:00

I'm not going to lie and say I'm nervous.

I'm VERY nervous. -_- But only for one particular subject, actually... The rest should be fine UNLESS Cambridge is cruel and chooses to come up with some very tough paper this year. I hope not... But they usually don't. Usually. Omg omg omg. -____- Everyone says 'A' levels is usually harder than 'O's and stuff. As in content-wise, of course its higher-level, but they say the question toughness relative to the standard of the content we learn is higher... Its really quite demoralising to hear, though I dunno if its true or not.

But (again) I think I should be able to get through... Except that I'll probably fail Maths. That's why I'll probably focus on Maths for the remaining few days left. Notice how I said days... The official count to 3rd Nov is currently... 11 days. Or 12 if you choose to look at it optimistically and include today. Or, go for 1 and a half weeks if you'd like.

I'll do abit of the other subjects also, but it will mostly be recap work I think. For Geog, its 'case studies' time. For Chem and Bio, I'll probably have to memorise and memorise, especially for Inorganic Chem, Photosynthesis, Respiration, etc. All those "mere regurgitation of fags" topics. For GP... How are you supposed to study? I guess I'll just read the newspapers or whatever. -_- My weakness tends to lie in essay-writing anyway, rather than Paper 2. And mostly its either writing off-topic or not being able to come up with fresh points. If you have any interesting (and relevant) news articles to share then share with me... Relevant hor. That means I don't want to hear about the stripper in Ang Moh Kio or whatever.

I doubt its enough but I think we've done enough practice papers in school already. I'll vomit if I do another practice paper. Yeah I have no study drive at all... Usually J1's will say they're not meant for JC, so its too late for me to complain now I guess. Hah actually if I go to Poly now, imagine how retarded it would be, having spent 2 years studying all this for nothing and missing 'A' levels by a hair's breadth. Then I'll have to go through another 3 years of education in a new school. Yay. -_-

Anyway, I bet I'll have to learn how to love Maths in 12 days if I wanna do well.

That's why life sucks sometimes. Its really true that you have to do stuff that you hate sometimes. Its all so that you can grow up and do more stuff that you hate. And earn money. Then die. But I digress (as usual)...

12+17=29. Only one month left until 20th November, which is Bio Paper 1. The last paper.

I can't wait. I can start gaming again (without a guilty conscience). I can start Roleplaying again (without a guilty conscience). And I can go render myself physically fit. Somehow.

Random blah-ing.

2008-10-15T14:11:00.004+08:00

Its funny how moods can shift so quickly. I'm no exception to being dynamic... The funny thing is, if I spend too much time at home, I start to miss school, and if lessons drag on forever I get the urge to just go home and watch TV or something...

Oh and IT is going to come in about 2 weeks' time, and I still feel quite relaxed. I'm not hyperventilating or anything. Yet...

Dunno if I mentioned it before, but the first day of 'A' levels is my birthday. -____- Woopee. Ya I don't really want presents. Having people remember my birthday is good enough, really. Unless you want to get a cat. Then by all means go ahead. =) Real one la. I like black cats.

Ok ANYWAY...

Its like, you wake up at 6 am on your birthday then get dressed for school, then take two GP papers and one Geog paper. When you get home at 6 or 7, you have to study for Maths paper 2.

Grr. But I guess it could be worse... Like having your birthday on the 29th of February. =/ I think my father said this before... One of my cousins has her birthday on that date and she only celebrates it every 4 years...

ALOYYYYYYY! XD Disgusting!

But today is a great day. The sky is horribly dark now, and I can hear (not just a pitter-patter but) a very intense slamming of raindrops against the roof and stuff. Oishiiii. -_-

(And something very trivial to add: I bought lip balm. -__- Because my lips are peeling and there's this sort of burning sensation around my mouth for no apparent reason. I feel so auntie! And the lip balm wasn't as cheap as I expected either... Oh and yes, I did drink enough water, I'm very sure of that. I wonder why its like this...)

Mucusal

2008-10-13T13:41:00.004+08:00

I feel sick today, and the ironic thing is, I went for study leave on Friday and my father wrote that I had flu.

Tomorrow I'm going to be absent cos of flu and my father will probably write a letter saying that I went for study leave. Retribution for Friday? -___-

Oh whatever, it doesn't matter anyway... School's so boring and there's nothing we can do. Even if I had no flu I probably would'nt wanna go tomorrow... There's a Maths paper to complete so yeah. 6 hours of Maths, yay.

Today is a 'meh' day cos of my very acute blocked nose. I could'nt stop sneezing and blowing my nose. It wasn't very tiring or sickening but my nose was blocked, and it was kind of annoying and hard to breathe.

Ya I know no one ties double ponytails nowadays anyway, unless they're below 10 years of age (and female, hopefully). And that isn't me either with the horrid sideparting, that's a stickman. Okay haha not funny whatever. I'm sorry because that probably wasted around 10 seconds of your life. In fact this whole blogpost is quite a waste of time... I'm just posting it because I wanted to draw something for some reason.

I just sneezed twice, yay.

Bottle It Up

2008-10-08T14:36:00.005+08:00

I want to tell them all how I feel, but I can't because I'm supposed to be unemotional and communicate (using grunts) with my brothers-in-arms or whatever. I'm stupid.

The gallows and guillotine look very appealing today, so does the 30th floor of a random HDB flat. But I made a promise to myself long time ago- not to force death, but to embrace it when the appropriate time comes.

Oh and there's lots of cats hanging around our school, I realised. Most are pretty nice. I hope Tilly is okay... If a little black kitten running away makes one feel so much pain, I can't imagine how one would feel if their own child left the house...

A heaped tablespoon of worry, a cup (or perhaps 10 cups) of anger, 500 ml of frustration, a tiny pinch of stress, a sprinkle of helplessness and an even sprinkling of guilt. Add paranoia to taste. Let it simmer over a period of a few months...

Voila! The perfect recipe for emotional turmoil, a dish with the flavour of week-old shit, which leaves a horrid aftertaste to boot.

Errrr...

2008-10-06T17:19:00.002+08:00

'A' levels are coming. Aahh.

Run, hide, flee...

... Or fight back!

There's a banner that someone placed at the grandstand and each day, the numbers decrease irreversibly, much to my unhappiness. 24 days left. In all cliche-ness, time truly passes quickly, and these two or so years have had their fair share of suckish-ness and woohoo-ness (but not all of it happens in school), and I'm really going to miss them both. I think...

School nowadays is honestly very boring, because all we do are specimen exam papers and there's no proper lessons. Even the lecture slots are mostly used to do tests and exam papers. Like Radiah said, there's nothing new to learn. But we can't blame anyone for that... Not teachers, not the principal, not even the education system, because there's going to be a huge exam coming up soon that will make or break us, and these boring papers are, unfortunately, necessary... Not to mention there's nothing more left to teach that's still in the syllabus... I think. As always I can never be sure when I talk about such high-profile stuff. It may or may not seem high-profile to you but its definitely beyond me because I'm just a student. =/

Just have to endure it I guess... And as with any other despicable thing, I can afford to wait for it to start, but I simply cannot wait til it ends.

=) <--- It doesn't look like one, but this is a pained and forced smile. Exactly how I feel right now, and not just because of 'A' levels.

Insecurities

2008-09-22T17:35:00.003+08:00

Naggy draggy ranting post, saturated with opinions and angst...

------

Today I was watching TVMobile on the way home. The show was called My Blog World or something like that, which apparently follows the stories of bloggers (don't know if they're fictional/exaggerated or not, but...)... This particular episode dealt with eating disorders and insecurities on weight. The 'star' in this episode was a girl named Jane.

Typical plot, such that even I could predict it. And I think I'm really quite n00b00b at predicting this type of thing.

Basically this girl is teased by her friends and stuff, who call her 'pang zi' (fatty) and other hurtful things. So she decided to go on a crash diet, exercising beyond her limits, eating little and inducing vomiting after every measly meal that she takes... Her parents and friends were all worried, but she claimed that they 'did not understand her', though she admitted that she was worried about herself as well... I stopped watching after she fainted at a volleyball game, because I had to get off the bus. =P

Now even though the storyline is somewhat cliche, I think the message really hits home. Nowadays I've really seen alot of similar cases around, though they may not be as serious and apparently have a less adverse impact on the person... There's your typical girl who thinks she's fat, like Jane's case. There's also guys who think they're not muscular enough, not tall enough, not manly enough or whatever. Girls who are 'too tomboyish'. I'm not immune to it either I guess. I often have misgivings about myself...

Its really sad to not believe that you're worth it, whether 'it' is a partner, a size 'M' dress or even the right to live. Okay my problem hasn't gone that far, (and I don't wear dresses, hehe) and I THINK I can keep it under control, but watching Jane's story (even if, like I said, it may have been fictional or dramatized) really slapped me hard. I have got to be more careful about the remarks I'm giving out from now on...

I think its really true that the human sense of confidence is more fragile than many make it out to be... Of course, sometimes people making the remarks may have good intentions, or they themselves may feel insecure and wish to pass their burden on to others. (I admit that I often indulge in the latter... And sadly I often don't regret it afterwards...)

But is it really to their benefit? Is it to YOUR benefit? Don't even have to talk about happiness here, this is just basic satisfaction with yourself...

Okay I don't know how others think about this, but I'm actually fine with hearing these remarks in general. However, sometimes on horrible days, I really feel like crying, expressing intense anger, or otherwise showing the person that they really have hurt me.

So what do I do... I hurt them back lor. Either I yell at them or retort with a sarcastic/biting remark... Vicious cycle indeed, keyword: vicious.

Oh and yeah, this time I'm not going to elaborate on whether animals face similar problems or not... Their's is a life and death case, I'd say. The fat bird won't go for liposuction, it will be eaten by a leopard and its DNA will forever be slashed off the genepool.

But then again, fat birds probably have a higher chance of surviving winter. They have a selective advantage there, don't they?

(Ok so in the end I ended up elaborating about it anyway. =/)

I wonder when winter will come for the fat, tomboyish, effeminate, short, etc etc etc birds in our society. But hopefully the winter isn't too harsh, or we may never see another skinny bird again...

(Disclaimer: No offense meant to anyone, really. I'm not upset either, mind you. -_-)

Musical randomisation

2008-09-19T19:54:00.008+08:00

Warning: Very long. Skip it or skim it. I don't think you should read it properly unless you have plenty of time. And also I guess its quite opinionated. I ended up giving my thoughts on most of the songs along with the quiz answers...

I saw this Meme on Yongjin's blog a few months ago, but I didn't have a playlist then. Now I do. XD So yeah... Here goes. Even though I'm using Windows' Media Player... -_- I think its a pretty good idea to leave your answers to Fate, hehe. Oh and most of the songs are from other people, so most likely you would've heard of at least some of them before... Also I remember seeing a similar/the same meme on Qingpei's blog, so yeah. But YJ's blog has a search function, QP's one has it hidden I think, so I went to kope from Jin.

--

I solemnly swear that all the following answers were completely chosen at random by the hand of Luck.

1. Put your music player on shuffle mode.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn't make sense.no cheating
4. With your answers, give your own comments on how it relates to the questions.
~~5. Tag 5 people.~~

How are you feeling today?
Takeoffs and Landings - The Ataris
(A really loud song, but the lyrics are quite okay. I guess its appropriate, since these few weeks have had lots of ups and downs along with them. Oh and as an offhand note, the song title sounds kind of innuendo...)

Will you get far in life?
What Time Is It - Highschool Musical 2 OST
(Lololol, I'm trying very hard to link this to the question... I guess its hinting I just have to wait for nature to take its course. Or something. Oh and its 8pm, btw. -_- And incidentally, this song was stuck in my head for pretty long a few months back. I like Vanessa Hudgens' voice alot.)

How do your friends see you?
Chocolate - Snow Patrol
(I guess I'm tasty. -_- But I do like chocolate, and so do alot of my friends I guess. Radiah immediately comes to mind. XD Oh and the song's quite nice, its the 'at-first-glance-its-slow' kind with a somewhat upbeat rhythm. I quite like it.)

Will you get married?
Run - Snow Patrol
(I was really praying hard for the right answer... Looks like I got it! Talk about lucky, oh and same artist too. =/)

What is your best friend's theme song?
9 - Unknown Track
(I haven't really thought about who's my best friend though... I think I like all my friends so far. But whoever you are, I guess you're an enigma currently. XD Oh and its really an Unknown Track. Its not the song title or artist... And the track really does sound somewhat enigmatic, though techno and down-to-Earth. At least to me.)

What is the story of your life?
Mani - Paco Fernandez
(Hehe. XD Its my game name, what a frickin' coincidence. -_- Oh and incidentally, if I remember correctly, it also means sperm in Malay, which is why I sort of reverted back to Gwen or ZhengWen or Gani... Hmmm. That's not very good! My life isn't spermy. =/ Oh and its a Mexican-sounding song, based on the instrumentals. Singer does his job in Spanish (I think!) and does very little, but its all good. Its rather nice. The kind that gets you tapping your feet. Wonder what Mani means in Mexican? Or Spanish or whatever. Meh.)

What was high school like?
Track 14 - ABBA
(A peaceful, traditional-sounding piece that uses the flute alot. The singers (yes plural) sound like kids, singing in a language that sounds to me like African... Guess that means my highschool (that's secondary school right?) life was rather peaceful and innocent and child-like. Possibly tribal. XD)

How can you get ahead in life?
Zeta 2 - Reticuli - Special Defects
(A metal piece from Bat... It sounds somewhat eerie and uses alot of sax(aphone, heh.) I like it alot, even though there's no lyrics. I think its pretty interesting. But it doesn't answer the question... *thinks hard* I guess its telling me that my life is filled with Special Defects. -_-)

What's the best thing about your friends?
Crime of Passion - Bamble B
(Oh my God. -_- I hope not! I trust you guys still have it intact. ;) Oh and no, the song isn't about sex I think, its another love song. But I like the beat, and the singer's voice is... unique I guess.)

What's in store for this weekend?
Molitva - Marija Serifovic
(Translation anyone? =X I guess this means I'll be clueless and experience lots of language-related problems this weekend. -_- Oh and its a rather nice song, quite charming and the singer's voice is a little weird but still powerful and I guess worth listening to.)

Describe your grandparents.
Chopin, Nocturne Number 20 - Grigory Sokolov
(A nice, soothing piano piece. Its just like how I remember them... Two of them anyway, my maternal grandpa's still alive and I've never met my paternal grandma before she passed on.)

How's your life going?
Insatiable (The Mosquito Song) - Spin
(Weird, since I'm rather satisfied with my life thus far... And I'm no bloodsucker. XD I don't think I am anyway. As for the song, its a little strange IMO. The lyrics sound a little creepy, I'm not even sure if they're in English. I don't particularly like it nor do I hate it or anything, go check it out for yourself... I can't really figure out how its related to mosquitoes either.)

What song will they play at your funeral?
Birth of A God - Final Fantasy 4 OST
(And Death of A Mortal. XD Actually its quite creepy if you die and a deity is born a few days later... Eerie. Oh and the song is like, the typical videogame bossfight song. Really upbeat and dramatic... I'd really hate it if they played this at my funeral. Can't RIP. XD Oh but there is a somewhat mournful eerie part.

I want Hide and Seek to be played. =/)

How does the world see you?
What Is Love? - Haddaway
(EXACTLY! What is love?! I have lots of words to answer this but I bet they'll all make everyone unhappy so I shall not post them here. This song more or less hits the nail on the head, because there's no song titled 'Oversensitive Idiot'. Not in my playlist anyway. Oh and 'What Is Love' is pretty good. I like the female vocals part quite abit, it sounds somewhat 'siren-like'.)

Will you have a happy life?
Down to the Sea - Little Mermaid 2 OST
(That's pretty bad, but I have no intention of committing suicide. -_- I guess I'll be optimistic and see it as a sign that my life will be peaceful and beautiful, though somewhat eerie but still calming and wondrous, with lots of fresh sights. This is a little mermaid song, and its pretty serene. I have the version without lyrics, and I can hear lots of flute in it. I like flute, so I guess I like my life too. Yeah I'm trying very hard to tell you that I love my life...)

Do people secretly lust after you?
Mario Bross - Electrypnose
(Errrr... This song consists of lots of oldschool videogame blips and blops and stuff. Its a techno piece, and it actually sounds pretty fancy, upbeat... I think I just heard a tambourine. I really like it. The only vocals are like, 'Ah lai' and some robotic voice, though mostly its computerish sounds. Wow this is an addictive song... The type that makes you wanna dance, I think... Notice how I'm totally ignoring the question because its so strange. Oh and I still don't know which is the title and which is the artist. (Mario Bross - Electrypnose)

And its very long, at least more so than most songs in my playlist. -_- 7:36)

How can you make yourself happy?
Melodies of Life - Emiko Shiratori (Final Fantasy 9 OST)
(Music is the key to bliss... Listen to melacholy songs and try to pick out the hidden happiness from within... Incidentally, I really love this song. Give it a go, though I doubt you'd enjoy it, or have already heard it and found nothing special about it. But to me, it'll always have a special place "in my dearest memories", a "voice from the past". Sorry for the stupid lyric quotes. But really, whenever I listen to it I sort of feel my heart aching... I think Emiko Shiratori has a really nice voice. Give it a go if you're free. ;)

Listening to this makes me want to start a new FF9 game. Again!)

What should you do with your life?
Five Colours in Her Hair - McFly
(Am I supposed to go for a sex change, then to the hair salon? -_- Or go play with some lady's multicoloured hair? (No pervertness intended, honest!) Oh and this is one of those loud, upbeat rockish type of songs IMO. It was used in one or more of JJ's orientations... Or its a mass dance song at least, cos I've seen the councillors dance to it before. Its not bad, though there's alot of minor vulgarities in it, just a heads up if you don't like such things... And I just heard an innuendo line.

"I'd like to find out if she puts me in the mood!"

Its much more blatant than innuendo is supposed to be, actually. -_-)

Will you ever have children?
Hey Ya - Outkast
(Hey NO lah! Grrr, I don't really like kids much. Unless they're kittens. But hopefully they're not my biological children if they ARE kittens. -_- Oh and I like this song. Its really fancy, I love the beat especially. My favourite JJ mass dance song. XD Or perhaps its a tie with 'Pump It'.)

What does your mum think of you?
I Want To Hold Your Hand - The Beatles
(Aww, this is sweet. XD Maybe I should talk to my mum more... Its too bad she finds me retro though. -_- But then again, The Beatles are timeless I guess. I do quite like this song...)

What song would be played at your wedding?
Goodnight and Go - Imogen Heap
(Finally, Imogen Heap! Though I prefer 'The Walk' and 'Hide and Seek' to this. This song is not very 'Imogen Heap-ish', IMO. Not how I know her as a (dare I say it?) fan, anyway. Oh and yes, Goodnight and Go indeed, for several reasons...

1) I'm running from the altar, the vows and the priest. Go! Run faster. =)
2) Its 9, so Goodnight I guess. I spent 1 hour doing this... And I feel very uplifted now after listening to so many songs!
3) I've got to Go bathe.
4) Its the end of this Meme. Goodnight and thanks for reading.

---

I can't believe I typed so many lame jokes in one blog post. I hope I made you laugh. Please? I can see you smiling. Laugh! LAUGH!

Edit: I realised that I forgot to shuffle my songs... -_- Shat. So I'm doing the whole thing again, after shuffling it once, and posting both sets of results... No harm anyway, since its all luck-based. Its like trying the slot machine twice I guess, because it was broken on the first try. Hey, if you look at it this way, it was because of my luck that I forgot to shuffle anyway, hehe.

How are you feeling today?
Belong (Bassless Ambient Mix) - Spooky
(The band name is certainly apt... Though its also quite calming, sort of like meeting benevolent spirits I guess. And I guess that's how I feel also. Like I said, I'm lighthearted after listening to so many songs. Now I have to do it again. Meh.)

Will you get far in life?
What Time Is It - Highschool Musical 2 OST
(Same song again. -_- Same question too.)

How do your friends see you?
Mani - Paco Fernandez
(I guess I'm stuck with it. Grr. Though please call me Zhengwen or Gwen or Gani from now on, because of the sperm thing. (See above in the first try.))

Will you get married?
Melodies of Life - Emiko Shiratori
(Well, the chords of life are unpredictable, I guess... I don't deny that there's a chance I'll tie the nuptial knot, but its very slim...)

What is your best friend's theme song?
Mai Ya Tang - Zhou Jielun
(I don't really like Jay Chou much, and I honestly didn't find this song anything special, though to each his/her own I guess... Mai Ya Tang means some sort of candy, so I guess my best friend will be sweet. That's a horrible pun, I know.)

What is the story of your life?
Ugly - The Exies
(This is one of those moments where I'm not sure whether I should laugh or cry. -_- Qingpei, don't laugh. XD Oh but this song is rather fancy. It sounds angsty and bitey, aka 'emo' I guess. Somehow its different from other angsty and bitey songs though, but then again I'm not particularly well-versed in this genre.)

What was high school like?
Eyes on Me - Faye Wong (Final Fantasy 8 OST)
(I don't really like this FF song for some reason. Probably cos my FF8 game crashed and my save file was corrupted and I never got to complete the stupid game. Grr. But yeah I guess its a nice, romantic slow-dancing type of song, though I still prefer Melodies of Life (And incidentally, FF9 to FF8...) Give it a go, if you wish.)

How can you get ahead in life?
Track 10 - Unknown
(Unknown indeed. But I listened to it and its 'You Raise Me Up', though not by Taufik Batisah. No idea why its masquerading as an Unknown Track. Nice song, good song... Give it a try if you're free.)

What's the best thing about your friends?
Down to the Sea - Little Mermaid 2 OST
(Er... I don't see any link, really. Like I said earlier, though, this song is 'okay okay'...)

What's in store for this weekend?
Zeta 2 - Reticuli - Special Defects
(Looks like lots of metal, and lots of deja vu. Lots of saxing too. XD)

Describe your grandparents.
That's Where You Find Love - Westlife
(Indeed, though grandparents are not the only source... Oh this song is quite emotional I guess. They played it on JJ Night, which marks more or less the end of my school's orientation every intake. It succeeded in leaving a few people with leaky eyes when it was played at mine...)

How's your life going?
Softly (Dragging Me Down) - N-Trance
(Woah... Major uh oh! But I really don't feel that way about my life, I don't know why I got a song title that's so negative. I'm tired of repeating myself. XD Oh and this song is good, though the starting is abit creepy with the whispering and all... Though its pretty good after the intro. The singer has a rather nice voice. "When you do it (do it do it do it)! Softly dragging me down...!" XD)

What song will they play at your funeral?
That Thing You Do - The Wonders
(Even in death, I'm a wonder. -_- Incidentally I really love this song. "Breaking my heart into a million pieces, like you always dooo oooh!")

How does the world see you?
Over Soul - Feel Well (?)
(I've never really seen myself as a leader, which is how I interpreted this song title... But I guess I am rather spiritual? In some ways, at least. But I know I do feel well currently. =D)

Will you have a happy life?
Track 14 - ABBA
(I feel happy and relaxed when I listen to this, like there's still innocence and tranquility somewhere out there in the world. So, yes, I guess.)

Do people secretly lust after you?
Xiao Shou La Da Shou - (It doesn't say who the artist is.)
(Hehe. I want to be the da shou. XD It means 'small hand pulling big hand' or whatever when directly translated. Something like a kid leading an adult or summat. I hope this doesn't point towards pedophilia. But the song is ok, the singer's voice is quite nice and pure-sounding. But I can't catch the lyrics... I think its Chinese.)

How can you make yourself happy?
Unbreakable - Westlife
(Be stubborn? So far that's been a cause for sadness. -_- I guess I should persevere more though. I could do with putting more effort and diligence into stuff too. Oh and this song is pretty ok, even though its by Westlife, which I guess some of you might dislike... I might even go so far as to say that I love it.)

What should you do with your life?
Feel Good - N-Trance
(I try to.)

Will you ever have children?
Loss of Me - Final Fantasy 9 OST
(Hehe, how appropriate. They'll be more trouble than joy, I feel... This is my handphone ringtone, so you can sort of guess how much I like it. Yes, don't laugh. It has no lyrics, its just a simple piano (??? I think...) piece, but I feel that it can be interpreted in many ways... Somehow to me, it feels happier on some days and sadder on others, and also its sometimes calming. There's also a more upbeat version they use when Beatrix fights alongside Steiner in Alexandria in FF9, which is also good but IMO not that good compared to this. I guess I just prefer it in piano more.)

What does your mum think of you?
Northern Lights - Shaman King
(I light up her life. -_- But I think the Northern Lights are really pretty, though I'm not. XD Oh and the song is pretty upbeat and lively. Not much like me, though most of the lyrics are in Japanese so I obviously don't know what they mean...)

What song would be played at your wedding?
Pump It - Black Eyed Peas
(Please don't! -_- Oh and isn't it a tad inappropriate? Heh, I'm imagining some people in formal wear dancing vigorously now. Its pretty amusing.

"Pump It, louder! Pump it, louder! Slide, oh oh oh OH!"

But no! This is totally inappropriate, if I ever do decide to get married. Funny though, hehe. And I quite like it. Like I said, good for mass dances. Or solo ones I guess, if you're into this genre. I don't know what genre this falls into anyway but oh well.)

Lost it, my mind

2008-09-18T15:21:00.006+08:00

I hate the feeling of losing things, especially if they're important and/or cost money... You worry about how your parents (or the people who helped you get those things) will react, you worry about how you will deal til you get replacements, you worry about how you get those replacements, how the people you get those replacements from will react (especially if you're borrowing...) And you blame both yourself and other people, even if its not fair sometimes...

There's no such thing as 不羿而飞 (flying without wings)... Or perhaps its really my carelessness which has gotten them lost.

I lost my JJ collar pin. (Read below.)

I lost my 'A' level entry proof. (Can reprint but very paiseh... So its the least of my worries.)

I lost my GC. (That thing costs 200 bucks! SHAG!)

Out of all the things I've lost, I miss my ~~mind~~ GC the most...

Ok actually, I FOUND my collar pin in a pink box covered in lots of barbie doll stickers, while looking for my GC. I guess its clear who the culprit is... I wonder why she took my collar pin.

I wonder whether knowing this will help me find my entry proof and GC, or if, like I said, I am simply just stupidly careless and lost those things myself... So far its hinting towards the latter.

Or perhaps I've somehow offended some greater force/some superior being/my little sister and It/He/She/she is trying very hard to piss me off and ruin my mood and academic life or whatever...

Its working!

Oh and, you never know, my entry proof could be floating along the equatorial jetstream now, halfway to the US or whatever...

On the other hand (the one that isn't repeatedly slapping my forehead in frustration), thanks everyone, again, for helping with the GC and stuff... I genuinely appreciate it, especially those who put in alot of effort to help source for another GC or gave suggestions or lent me a GC.

One down, two more to go...
Too bad the search is going slow.
I'd really love to get to work.
But Lady Luck's being a jerk.

So embarrassing. XD

2008-09-16T14:11:00.003+08:00

Today during morning assembly, something stupid happened...

We were singing the national anthem, facing the grandstand, then a mynah landed on top of the grandstand roof, a few seconds through the anthem, carrying a very long twig in its beak.

Then halfway during the anthem, it opened the beak and the twig fell out of the mouth... Yeah it chirped. It was very cute to watch somehow, cos the twig was so long and it fell very slowly. I kept imagining a 'what-if' scenario, where it would hit someone on the head. XD (HODs stand at the grandstand, along with some councillors and the principals and yeah, during morning assembly, so its actually quite possible.)

Not to mention the mynah looked so glamorous and show-offy, as though it was trying to snatch everyone's attention...

Well no one got hit, but I ended up giving a loud, single-syllable snort-laugh halfway during the national anthem, because I was imagining someone reeling from the impact of the twig against their skull. I tried to cough after that, but then the damage had already been done... And I kept smiling secretively til morning assembly ended. -___-

And I was the only one laughing, hehe. So if you don't find it funny, I don't blame you. Yeah anyway afterwards someone turned back and he was like "You were laughing at the mynah right?"

(He wasn't the only one who turned back, unfortunately. =/ )

Lololol. -_- I'm so easily distracted...

Yeah its not exactly blogging material, but I thought it was rather funny (and somewhat embarrassing). I'm leaving it here just so that I can look back a few years later and laugh over it again, instead of having to vlog about the next Ice Age. LOL. (Its an inside joke, sort of.) -____-

P.S. Radiah told me the mynah flew away just as the anthem ended. Is it smart or just super coincidental? Either way, its pretty nifty I guess. I had a theory that maybe the mynah's sentient and it wanted to embarrass me or something. XD Yeah obviously I'm kidding.

But that's not the only embarrassing thing that happened recently. My Prelim papers are chocked full of stupid mistakes. -_-

Bio: There was one question asking for the significance of smell in four species (dogs, mice, humans, apes) and they gave an annotated diagram to use...

My answer was: Smell is most important in dogs and mice, and slightly more important in dolphins and least important in humans.

I don't know why the heck I wrote dolphins, but the marker circled it and wrote three question marks there. XD So I only got 1/2 for that question. Poo.

Then for Chem, I wrote something like: "the lone-pair-bond-pair repulsion is stronger than the lone-pair-bond-pair repulsion." -______-

For Maths I made A WHOLE LOT ALOT ALOT ALOT of errors with + and - signs. Very careless mistakes... Not very funny but they were crucial. One reason why I got 'S'. I bet I could've gotten an E at least if I had checked my signs properly. Grr.

I'm such a sotong... I realised that having time limits is very stressful, and I tend to make lots of silly mistakes under exam stress. Grr again.

I'm going for the US program on Friday for Maths. Its not as nifty as it sounds. 'US' stands for 'ungraded/subpass'...

I think I really need it.

Carousel. Lor.

2008-09-15T16:03:00.002+08:00

Yeah, if you've read Hermes' blog then you would have known that we went to some high-class restaurant yesterday. My uncle's being posted to Hong Kong so he treated us to a sort of farewell lunch. Kind of weird, cos he already lives in Malaysia and the rest of us live here, so we can't really see much of him anyway...

If you want photos then go Hermes' blog. XD I'm abit lazy to kope the photos, so go look at them yourself. I linked her, lolol.

Yeah I look like an idiot. -_- I didn't smile properly. Boo.

Yeah. I tried lots of new stuff yesterday...

1) Coffee creme brulee. It tastes so good that your taste buds feel like they are _______... Yeah go fill the blank up yourself. ;) Basically its very good, just a hint of coffee taste, which is nicely balanced out by the caramel/sugar taste.

2) Raspberry/Strawberry something... A little too sweet but quite good. Tastes alot like ice cream without the ice. I prefer ice cream cos the chill sort of numbs the sweetness.

3) Lobster. I don't really like it. Its cold, chewy and a little plain... Crab is still better. But then prawns are still the best. XD

Don't know why the top-end folks enjoy eating it so much... Especially the stereotypical rich bimbos or whatever. Like London Tipton from The Suite Life of Zack and Cody.

4) Asparagus with Hollandaise sauce. Is the sauce from Holland? Anyway it tastes creamy, but it is quite nice as well. But creamy means lactose... I didn't get diarrhoea though. XD

5) Mango pudding. Ok I've eaten this before elsewhere, but yeah. It was tasteless to me... I think cos I ate 2) just before it, and the sweetness of the berries probably killed off the mango taste...

Overall quite good. The sushi there was fantastic. Unagi might've been the best I've tasted. I love Unagi sushi. XD

Yeah... Okay nothing better to blog about. Life has been rather boring. I got my Prelims results but I'm not sure if I wanna post them here for everyone to see. For the most part, I'm satisfied with them, though.

Except Maths. XD But I deserved that 'S' I think...

What's the damage?

2008-09-09T14:06:00.003+08:00

"Aiyo, stubid students. Before exam, complain must study so much! During exam, complain time not enough! After exam, complain results so lousy!"

I failed Maths. Got an S. =X

But I think I overreacted just now during school... Sorry everyone, especially Mr Chai, lol.

But only Qingpei is into Nino, the rest of us aren't... -_-

I got a C for Chem at 62.something... They didn't count our SPA marks though, because they're secret of course. Hopefully SPA would pull everything up for the actual 'A' levels. Counting on at least a B for the BFG (Big falking exam)...

We didn't get the other papers back yet. GP, Geog and Bio... Ok we got part of Bio back... I hope I do well for GP and Geog.

GP and Geog are perhaps the most unpredictable subjects. My grade has been fluctuating quite alot over the 2 years in these subjects...

Sunday before Doomsday

2008-09-07T18:45:00.003+08:00

Okay maybe it will not turn out to be a total Doomsday. I mean, I (think that I) won't be getting my Maths Prelim paper back tomorrow, for one. XD

I'm rather sure that I flunked it. I would rather not know my marks til the latest date possible... =/

Tomorrow, I'll get Bio, GP and Chem back if the timetable remains the same from last term... I must say that I'm feeling both relaxed and nervous at the same time...

Relaxed because I managed to finish all the Chem/Maths practice papers assigned to us (YAY!) and before they're due too! (Double YAY!) I initially thought I would be going out today, because my father said he wanted me to meet his friend's son or something (apparently that guy's "almost my age; 1 year older than me.") but then we ended up having to stay at home because the new maid (Lai Lai) is sick with a fever.

Which is totally fine with me, because to be honest I didn't want to go out anyway. I don't enjoy meeting new people, especially when there's Maths papers to be done! I swear I would have flipped if I had to go out today, even though the Maths paper is due in a few weeks... Yeah, I'm just making excuses. I hope the guy is nice though, if I ever get another chance to meet him again...

Back to Lai Lai's sickness. I wonder if it has anything to do with her cleaning the house so much these past days... Its quite amazing how she has cleaned the WHOLE house... I noticed that its really very tidy and stuff. And whenever I saw her she would be cleaning or cooking or doing other household chores. Its a little scary... Doesn't she take a rest? At least Yaya will go downstairs with Caroline regularly, and they interact with the other maids and the other kids and stuff.

Oh yeah, about Lai Lai... She's quite nice, very polite (which makes me feel a little bad when I talk to her...) and I think she's from Indonesia, based on her accent. Though I could be wrong... Yaya was Filipino, so yeah. I'm pretty sure Lailai is Indonesian. But I've hardly heard her talk since she got here anyway... She seems pretty introverted. Which is good. There is enough extroversion in this family already anyway.

Anyway, I'm nervous because of the Prelim papers we'll be getting back tomorrow. All of you have probably taken exams before (even if it was a few decades ago, hehe!) and I guess you should understand how nervous one can get while awaiting the results... Some scholarship holders do take the prelims into consideration, I think. So yeah... They do count. Not that I applied for any scholarships because I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT BLOODY CAREER I WANT! But the Prelims will be good for a morale boost, either way. I'm pretty sure its gonna boost mine in a negative manner for Maths... Though to be honest I am quite certain I can do well for other subjects. (Or pass, at least.) Yeah, I admit that I'm feeling (more or less?) confident. Want to take a screenshot? Its a rare event!

I hope I can sleep tonight. I'm feeling quite hyper now. Woohoo!

I think I will get Spore tomorrow at Jurong Point, just to try it out. The release was today, at Funan, so hopefully it would've made it into stores by now. Checked it out online, Comics Connection and CyberActive should be selling copies of Spore. I have saved for months for it after all... But I promise I will quit playing Spore once 'A' levels come close! (That leaves me less than 1 month, perhaps.)

For better or worse, for rich or for poor, in sickness and in health, til death do us part, I promise!! I do... I do! I really do! (You may kiss the bride. -_-)

But seriously, I do trust my capacity to deal with gaming addiction. I think...?

No, I don't think, I KNOW!

(I hope this isn't a bad idea...)

More Dream Journal stuff

2008-09-06T12:05:00.005+08:00

I achieved lucidity again... But it didn't last. XD In my dream, I think I was dreaming about school again, but I can't really remember what happened, except that it probably took place in a classroom or something. But I do remember that I looked at my watch a few times in quick succession. It went from 1:18 or something to 6:69 (which is an interesting number. XD) then back to 1:18 then 6:69 again, within a span of 10 or so seconds, so I sort of knew it was a dream. I read in wiki that one dream sign to look out for was that the readings on digital watches tend to change very quickly in dreams, and I guess that carried forward into my dream.

Then I told myself: "This must be a dream, since the watch thing happened......"

Then suddenly everything became so chaotic and my mind flooded with images that could've been best described as 'explosions'... I went from the sleep state to a transition, then I woke up with my eyes shut. =/ I think I got too excited upon finding out that I was in a lucid dream. Oops. But I went back to sleep again, of course. Since I could still tell that it was dark in the waking world.

Then after that I had a non-lucid dream... It was quite interesting, because it was very very very realistic. No randomness at all, this time.

I went mountain-climbing, I think with Hermes? Not very sure... Yeah we were climbing a snowy mountain, I think. As we got higher, I could feel the air growing thinner, and my breathing began to accelerate very rapidly and I grew more and more breathless. But I felt no cold at all, even though the surroundings were totally snowy and stuff... There was fog too. The kind that's thick and soupy.

I remember that part of the dream was, strangely, a flashback of another guy (whom I've never met before, probably some figment of my imagination) who had climbed the same mountain previously... And I could see him climbing in a third-person view in my mind's eye with some other people, and it looked really arduous and difficult for him to make the journey. He looked of Chinese origin (or probably something like Japanese maybe? I can't quite remember.) but like I said, I've never met him before.

He said something like this... (Or he told me, if you choose to look at it that way) "I gave up halfway, because I knew that if I proceeded, I would die. But from where I was, I stretched my hands up and I could feel a jetstream flowing by."

Jeez, it sounds like some line from a corny drama series. -_-

I don't know if jetstreams travel that low, but then I doubt it. Also his hands probably would have been stripped of their skin or something by the speedy winds of the jetstream... They're about 400km/h, if I remember correctly from Geog. Still it was an interesting dream, I think. I've never had one where you can feel the air growing thinner. It really felt as though I was climbing a mountain!

I think the dream ended when I looked down at the sea, while standing somewhere along the path that was leading to the peak of mountain. There was a shipwreck there, and the ship looked completely new; its hull was white and frosty like the snow, without a barnacle in sight. It wasn't a boat either, but more like a cruise ship. But it was half-submerged in icy saltwater...

Now I have the urge to go mountain-climbing.

Eeeevaaa! Warrrlleeeee!

2008-09-05T18:46:00.009+08:00

Hehehe.

Today was really fun!

I woke up at 9, after having two dreams. One about some classmates, and one where I became a JJ councillor. (The latter was horrible, it felt so real. =( A councillor's job is just too stressful for me.)

Yep. Then Qingpei, Radiah and I went to watch WALL-E. Been wanting to watch it since I saw the ad on Disney Channel. I've watched all of Pixar's animated films over the years (except Toy Story 2), some more than once, and I must say that WALL-E is my favourite now. Sorry Ratatouille, you've now been bumped down to second place. Yes, WALL-E himself is cute, so is EVE (whose voice I like alot) and the little cockroach friend of WALL-E's. It was a pretty nice movie, and I do like the plot quite abit. Earth's been reduced to a garbage dump and all. My favourite outcome of the future. Okay I'm starting to sound like some mad scientist so I'll stop.

I nearly cried when I saw WALL-E getting crushed. It was just so saddening. =( But I love his eyes, they're very emotive, especially for a robot! Now I know how Qingpei felt when she watched her robot Jdrama, though her's was probably far more heart-wrenching. =X

And then we met Geetha and went to Hortpark together. I wonder if the class would be interested in a class outing there, though I highly doubt it.

Fodos. XD But the weather was too hot and sunny, not my favourite weather for photography. The best days are either rainy or cloudy-ish with little sun. Bright, sunny days may spell optimism for an optimist, but they turn your photos into little white, overexposed squares. =/

Not to mention walking under the full wrath of the sun felt horrible, though it was ok cos I drank lots of water and stuff, and I'm taking some cooling Eight Treasures Tea now. And I'd better get used to it...

Someone got married today! And some creepy guy was taking photos of them secretly...

Sorry about my shadow. =P
Mulberry! I think its an unopened flower bud? Not very sure.

No idea what this is, but it looks very exotic.

I kind of like this pic. I've always loved taking shots of water.
I like this too, though I'd love it far more if it was night-time.

Blergh. XD

Its a bamboo shoot. I've never seen one before!

Talk about gluttony.

I was bored at the rest station. =/
I like these little things. But I don't know what they're called.
The Greenhouse. (One of them anyway.)

Just to emphasize how bright the sunlight was. -_-

Its weird, because there was an isolated patch of some aquatic plant (water hyacinth maybe? Not sure) in the middle of some canal. I suppose its for regulating the levels of chemicals in the water or sth? Dunno.

I was lucky to catch it in flight, though it looks more like a missile than a pigeon.
What can I say? Very lucky. Even though its a little blurry but yeah whatever.
I like pigeons. =)

It was hard taking a shot of this, since the plant was swaying in the wind.
Sorry if that creeps you out, but I think its cute.

Some underpass or something. Nice eh? I love Hortpark. XD

A rhino. =P
I wanted to get a shot of the sun, so here. Another shot to emphasize how bright, hot and sunny it was today.
It must've taken pretty long to prepare this.
This is the recyclo-garden, and I liked it alot. There was even a plant potted in a construction worker's helmet!
In case you can't see (which I highly doubt), it spells 'A-S' I wanted to add another 'S' at the back, but then we had no time. XD

I know its not exactly symmetrical or whatever. Sorry lah.
The lantern reminded me of WALL-E. -.-
I like this one. =) I would'nt want to call it abstract or anything, but I'll leave you to guess what it is. Should be pretty obvious, I think? Though not something you'd really expect to see in a park, I guess. Bleh.
This turned out nicer than I thought it would... So yeah. Great. The sky looks nice IMO... Totally not how it FELT.
Hehe. Isn't he a hunk? -_-

I like this plant alot! I don't know its proper name so I just call it the 'paper-rose'.
Heh...
Unique flowers, no? I've never seen a plant that looks like this before. Thanks, Geetha, for noticing it. =P
I tried that blue shot again. Yeah...

Like Radiah pointed out, I highly suspect this is chamomile, or a close relative at least. But oh well, we can't enter the greenhouses, so we could'nt really confirm...
... But they're beautiful anyway, even from the outside.
Too. Much. Sunlight. Grr.
I saw this plant at the Garden Festival a few weeks back. I think its called Silverdust or something? I forgot, but the name was pretty apt.
I think this is my favourite shot of the day. I was VERY lucky because the water was captured as black thanks to the shade of the pond, enhancing the look of the entire lotus flower, I guess. Contrast is fun to play with!

Some kind of fungi?
Bad shot, I think? No harm posting anyway.
Pomelo!
A different species of fungus. Oh and there's a millipede there too! Sorry if that scared you.
Another millipede. =)

I've always wanted a shot of recycling bins of different colours side by side. So there. No, you don't have to feel inclined to use them or anything like that, because I myself don't always recycle anyway. There I admitted it.

Fishy! -_-

I thought this pic turned out well. The plants really look very uniform and stuff.
This has papery flowers like the 'paper-rose' but I didn't give it a self-made name yet. I love the flowers though. They're even more papery than the 'paper-rose's'. Jeez.
Another cultivar of the unnamed, papery plant.
Don't know what this is but... Yeah. O_o
I believe this is a daisy, though I'm no expert at identifiying plants of course.

Sorry! I could'nt resist sneaking in another pigeon shot. XD
Who's favourite species is this? MINE! Venus flytraps RULE.
Pitchers plants. Looks like its from the genus Nepenthes, based on my pathetic amount of knowledge on carnivorous plants.
I love the fully red traps, and also the 'hybrid' green traps with red lips. Maybe its Maybelline. XD
Another sort of pitcher plant. The leaves look abit like D= faces... I guess.

I was VERY lucky to capture this. I've always wanted to take a photo of these shiny green flies. I keep seeing them all over the place, but they keep fleeing. Not this one. Thanks little buddy!
There's a red-and black bird near the center of the shot, near the pink puffy flower thing, but I doubt you can spot it easily.
Icosahedron? I don't know if its 20-sided but yeah, its a nice shape!

Its semi-candid but I took her hand by accident, ok. -_-

Just by looking at this, I feel a little prickly all over. =X

Radiah took this shot! We were trying to capture water dripping from the ceiling, but obviously the droplets were too fast, even with hi-speed shooting. =/

Ticones. XDXD
It looks so posh, doesn't it?

And the water looks really beach-like and stuff. At least the sun is good for SOMETHING.

Some bamboo garden. There's a maze on the floor, if you look carefully.
I love these big black bees, though I would'nt want one near me... Yes, I know its blur.
*shine*
Reminds me of cauliflower. XD

Dragonfly... I'm sorry, the algae sort of makes the shot look all scummy and stuff.
Another bee, closing in.
Woohoo! I feel blessed to have captured this!
Finally, I got a shot where the bee can be seen clearly!
Just playing around with the zoom.
Hmm. Yeah, overexposed, probably.
I was focusing on the fish, but I guess they're hardly obvious when placed beside the plants and reflections in the water.

This plant reminds me of the phrase 'tongues are wagging'. =D

That's about it. I did try more non-macro shots this time, so yeah... I'm sorry, this blogpost contains about 100 or so photos, by the way. But don't feel bad or sian or anything, because I took 200+. So you're only seeing half. XD

Some little guy is hitting my nerves with a club

2008-09-04T12:27:00.004+08:00

What do you do when everyone around you is tense?

And you're not... I don't know whether I'm apathetic, carefree or just lazy, but this lack of stress is unnerving me. I wonder why I am so relaxed... Is it because I am more relaxed than I should be, or that everyone else is more stressed than they should be?

Not in the sense that I'm still playing and stuff, but I totally don't feel like I'm taking 'A' levels this year. Its more like some exchange programme where I go around learning new stuff and having fun.

I feel very tired today. Read: ARGH!! Like I said, it feels like some tiny guy is repeatedly bashing my neurones with a club. My head pounds a little, and I don't feel like doing anything except sitting in front of the computer, but not to game... Maybe to use MSN and possibly write something later? I hope the blackcurrant tea makes it better. I would take lemon, definitely, because its perfect for days like this, but I want to follow the tea cycle.

Today is a good day to write something long and uninteresting. Everyone will say that its either 'good' or 'bad', but they'll all eventually forget all about it, and I'll be the only one to remember it and lament its wasted existence. (Sorry I digressed.)

But I doubt it will be any good, plus I can't think of anything particularly fancy to write about nowadays. I was doing that book but then I just gave up. Who am I kidding? I can't write a book.

Not to mention there's some schoolwork lying around, screaming for me to touch it. XD (Sorry.) Chem and Maths. I'm already at least halfway through for both subjects, but I'm halfway to the deadlines as well. Which is fine with me. I still feel in-control over everything.

I wish I was feeling a more powerful state of being than fatigue right now. Then perhaps I can get to writing something really long that most people will ignore or just skim through. Currently, today just feels so boring and uninteresting. Nothing is fun anymore, and work feels like play feels like work.

RARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

2008-09-03T21:02:00.004+08:00

You hit me and I hit you back!

Verbally, physically, psychologically...

We both feel hurt and nobody wins.

Why do people still hit each other?

To get rid of anger?!?!

I only see MORE ANGER being created...

To get what they want?

They must want pain.

Typing in disjointed sentences feels good. So does ripping paper into little shreds. (Then recycling it, of course.) Very therapeutic for the brain, even if it may not make logical sense. I wish life was simpler. Maybe if I was an only child. Or okay, I would'nt mind keeping ONE of my sisters. The one with more than half a brain, and less than half the brattishness it takes to get on my nerves.

Simply yuck

2008-09-03T12:46:00.003+08:00

Promise not to laugh. You can gag or 'YUCK' though. Which is what I'd do if I were reading this for the first time.

Okay, someone spilt milk all over my desk a few days ago. MILK. I was like "Please be water, please be water... please be water..." when I first came in and saw that the desk was wet.

I would cry but then that would be cliche. (If you don't get it then good for you, you're lucky you didn't have to endure that horrible play on words, its a really lame attempt anyway.)

So that night I went to wipe it... Even though I didn't spill it, and BOTH my sisters deny that they had any role to play in it... (Who else could it be? I mean I'm lactose intolerant, it definitely wasn't me. But the cup looked like my little sister's... Hmm. They both say they didn't knock it over. Am I to believe that the cup fell over by itself? Grr.)

So I was a little irritated but everything was settled. My mum and yaya also helped to clean a little. Actually I think they did more than me, but anyway...

I thought everything was fine until last night, when I felt nostalgic all of a sudden, and went to look at the class photos and noticed that they were sticky. -_- And then I was like "That better not be milk..." And just like every other cruel twist of fate that has taunted me since the day I was born... it did turn out to be milk. So I went to ask my dad if its possible to wash photos with water and soap.

Amazingly, you can! XD I learnt something new. Yeah, so I went to wash them in the bathroom sink. I plugged it up with that convenient metal... plug-thingy. So I had clean class photos, and a plugged sink, filled with a few molecules of lactose, milk proteins and such. Which was still quite ok, even though the milk stank a little.

But then, ok I think I pushed the metal thing too far in, because I could'nt unplug it. Admittedly, this was my fault. How was I supposed to know that that particular sink was broken, and you could'nt pull it back out? =X

So my sister, she was brushing her teeth that night. Then, being the WONDERFUL GENIUS that she is, she spat in the sink. SPAT I TELL YOU. SHE BLOODY SPAT IN THE BLOODY SINK... AHAHAHAHHAH SHE SPAT THE TOOTHPASTE FOAM INSIDE! WHAT THE ****. When she saw that I was trying to unplug the sink... The water quickly turned into a white suspension of dental doom.

Me: *gaping at my sis for a few seconds* "........"
Me: "... What's that white stuff?"
Hermes: "Toothpaste lor! Oh, I think I ate tofu for dinner!"
Me: "... shadkjsjadjksajsdkadasksda"
Hermes: "What? I needed to spit ma."
Me: "COULD'NT YOU HAVE USED THE BATHTUB OR SOMETHING?!"

So I went to try to unplug it. My SMART sister lent me a Wang wang biscuits plastic wrapper, so I was like okay.

Hermes: "Use it to protect your hands."

So I rummaged in the foul SPITWATER and dug at the plug, but to no avail. Then the wang wang wrapper split and the DISGUSTING SEPTIC PRE-SEWAGE GROSS YUCKY YUCK YUCKSTER water came gushing into the interior, soaking my hands.

Initially, I was horribly DISGUSTED. I mean bloody falk; tofu and used toothpaste and God knows what else was living between my sister's teeth was now floating in the sink in some FILTHY COCKTAIL OF BLEGHNESS. So I got rid of the plastic bag, since my hands were dirty already, it was a little pointless to continue using it. She herself was like "EEE" (and started laughing incessantly.) when she saw me rummaging in the FOUL SPITWATER with my bare hands... And when I took them out, they started itching. -___-

Then, being the GREAT, HELPFUL, CARING and NON-SELFISH sister that she ALWAYS IS, she wanted to film me with her handphone.

"These are the moments you'll laugh at 10 years later!"

So I hit her repeatedly, locked the toilet door and dug at the thing for another 10+ minutes. To no avail again... It was stuck firmly and despite my best efforts I could'nt get it out. I was using my nails of course, which aren't long and are obviously very bad tools. But I did try some other stuff as well... The gap between the sinkhole and the plug is just too narrow to fit a good lever-like object inside. So nothing worked. Nothing that I thought of anyway, and we could'nt find the plunger. =(

Then my sister was like "I think there's a little switch in that HOLE that will release the plug." She pointed to a MOLD-INFESTED, GRIMY, SLICK, BLACKISH HOLE OF DOOM at the top of the sink. I've always wondered what that hole was for... I see it alot in sinks but it doesn't seem to play any important role or something. I didn't know it was so DISGUSTINGLY FETID. I DEFINITELY DIDN'T want my fingers in there, even though they were already incredibly dirty. So I took one of those Q-tips (the earwax digging things?) and then went to dig around for a catch or something. Obviously there wasn't one, but it was worth a shot, yes? I was tired, my hands were covered in A BLOODY ASSORTMENT OF FILTHY SLIME and I WANTED SO BAD TO GRIND MY SIS UP IN A BLENDER.

Hermes: "Take your hand out if you feel something crawling!"
Me: *involuntary twitch*

When I took the Q-tip out, it was BLACK. WHAT THE HELL. (At least my finger didn't suffer. I would've seriously puked if I saw the black stuff on my finger.) And the sink still wasn't unplugged...

So I gave up, and washed my hands 4 (FOUR!!!!) bloody times before the smell would go away. I used Johnsons', Dettol, and heck, even the Mama Lemon dishwashing detergent... Then I went to bed because I was tired, and I didn't want to touch the FOUL SPITWATER anymore...

Thank GOD, when I woke up the sink was unplugged. Someone else did the dirty work, though I must say I wonder how they did it... Oh, and I'm NEVER EVER EVER washing my stuff in that sink ever again. JEEZ.

Not to sound like some stereotypical blonde supermodel but, WTF CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT'S LIVING UNDER MY NAILS NOW?! Oh the FILTH...

Sorry if I sound so high-maintenence, but jeez... I consider myself quite tolerant of gross stuff already, but seriously, this GOES WAY OVER THE BLOODY LINE. Oh and, no, I'm not angry, just awfully DISGUSTED about last night's events. I now have a new respect for plumbers, especially those that deal with toilets.

She left

2008-09-02T11:10:00.003+08:00

Yaya went to work for another family today. I think her work permit expired so my mum introduced her to a friend of her's. So she's working for them now.

Okay she's actually leaving on Thurs/Fri, but yeah... She's leaving soon.

She was a very nice lady, quite okay, and she's been with us for a few years already. Hate to sound cliche, but she's almost like family, though she has her own back in her home. I hope she does well elsewhere because I don't think we've been treating her nicely (especially Caroline!)

She deserves better.

I've always wondered how maids do it... They have to leave their families behind and work for years under some strange foreign family in some strange foreign country. It must be torture for them. Not to mention their employers can be annoying and SO demanding sometimes, if not most of the time...

Ok, they're paid. But is money enough? Its necessary, but is it enough of a compensation?

I don't know. I wonder why The Philippines has so many migrants... No, I don't want an answer. -_- Especially not a textbook one. I'm warning all of you, don't kill my mood, because I feel rather light and carefree today, though its fleeting and I can feel residual irritation lingering around still. This is one of those days where I will seriously explode if I get angry. But ironically, I feel 'in control' as well. Maybe because I've been balancing schoolwork and 'relaxation' rather well...

Oh and I think my parents want to hire a new maid. I guess they need to, since they're both working and Caroline is still only in Primary School. Not to mention my sis and I are schooling, and I have certain responsibilities to fulfill next year. =( Not that I'd enjoy looking after Caroline. She's a pain in the Golgi apparatus.

Sidenote: I did the 2007 A level Maths Paper 2 yesterday. Its very similar to our Prelim Paper... Not as difficult as I'd imagined but there's some tricky bits in it still. I feel driven today, so I shall complete P1 later on. =) I hope the JJ '07 Prelim isn't as hard as Qingpei said it was... Meh.

Teavaluation! -_-

2008-08-31T12:19:00.003+08:00

Ok, time to put the unhappy thoughts aside. And on the second day of frustration, my mind ordered me to digress.

These are my three favourite teas/herbal infusions so far, based on taste, smell and appearance. Just in case anyone needs a second opinion on what flavours of tea to try out, in case anyone's interested or something. (Maybe Geetha?)

It turns out most 'tea' (the caffeinated kind?) is brewed from leaves of the Camellia sinesis plant... I used to think that green tea, white tea, black tea etc were all brewed from different plants, but on reading Wiki I found out that the different colours/flavours of tea are brought out by different levels of processing and fermentation after harvesting. I think the order goes: White, Green, Oolong and Black, with oolong and black being fermented, green being pan-fried and white being fast-dried or something...

God knows what those terms mean. =X And I don't really feel like researching on them anyway, so... My advice is to cross-reference Wiki with Google if you really wish to find out more.

Note: Obviously this is all based on my personal opinion on things. Its just a little recommendation if you're REALLY unsure of what type to start off drinking. I think its best to go freeform and try everything though, if not you will be catering to my taste and not your's. But meh.

3) Green tea!

Ok I'm sure everyone knows what green tea is. It has many health benefits of course, like keeping bad breath away and its thought to increase fat metabolism for those who wanna slim down. (Not me. =D) I'm sure you've heard it being preached everywhere. I love it... But only the teabag kind, I find the bottled kind too sweet for my personal taste... The brewed type is mildly bitter with abit of a sweet aftertaste, and the smell is quite "Mmmm" also. And green tea helps to keep me awake, I choose to drink it on days when I need a pick-me-up badly... It has caffeine and other 'RARRRR, YOU BETTER WAKE UP' type of chemicals. I guess for me its just a coffee substitute.

Don't drink it at night, you won't be able to fall asleep. Trust me, green tea buzz is annoying. In fact I'd recommend drinking it in the morning, because at least for me, the buzz lasts pretty long. A few hours in fact.

Taste-> 4 (Slightly bitter with a sweet aftertaste. Tastes more vegetable-ish than most other teas. Which is good.)
Smell-> 3 (Smells like green tea. XD Green tea has its own unique smell that's difficult to describe. You need to try a whiff for yourself. No, not the canned kind. It has a totally different smell from the teabagged kind.)
Appearance->4 (I like the colour, because its green, duh. Greeeeeeen.)

2) Lemon tea!

The lemon tea I'm drinking is just black tea infused with lemon, but it makes a whole lot of difference! Its tangy and sour, and it tickles the tongue pleasantly. But the best part of the smell. Taking a whiff of the lemony odour is enough to wake me up and make me feel tingly all over. You have GOT to try this if you like the taste of lemons. (Don't give me that look! My sister likes lemons. =/ ) Its quite nice when its hot, and I'd take it over the packaged lemon tea any day.

Taste-> 4 (Tangy but not very sour. There's not much bitter tea taste. My guess is that the acidity of the lemon used neutralises most of the bitter oxide taste of the tea? Its a good combi nonetheless.)
Smell-> 5 (Excellent! If you've ever used any lemon aromatherapy products, then I guess it would smell like that. Very refreshing and energizing.)
Appearance-> 3 (It looks brown and generic, so yeah.)

And 1) White tea!

White tea is my favourite... It tastes very refreshing and light. IMO its not bitter at all, in fact it tastes rather fruity for some reason, especially the aftertaste. The colour is quite appealing too, it looks somewhat beige-ish. It reminds me of white wine somehow. The smell is pretty aromatic and predominantly fruity as well, which is quite surprising. And I've read that white tea is thought to contain less caffeine than green tea.

Taste-> 5 (Somewhat sweet, with mostly fruity undertones. And its very light, there's no lingering taste. At least not for me. Its very good, not too overpowering.)
Smell-> 4 (Fruity too. Pretty okay but not as refreshing to smell as lemon tea.)
Appearance-> 5 (It looks pale and somewhat refreshing. Yes, just by looking at it! Like I said, think white wine... Staring at it makes me feel light for some reason. -_-)

Yep, I'm in no way a food critic. This is just something I wanted to try out. Notice all the teas I enjoy the most generally have 'pick me up' qualities. That's cos I'm usually very tired, waking up at 5.50 am for school. So these are quite useful as well as tasty, they help me focus while studying and stuff.

So now for the others, which are quite ok but, in my opinion, not as good as these three.

Blackcurrant tea

Its nice if you like Ribena and the taste of blackcurrants, I guess, but its pretty bitter compared to lemon tea. Still drinkable but I prefer lemon tea's smell and taste alot more. I drink it only because I don't want to drink lemon/green/white tea everyday. Appearance-wise, it looks like lemon tea. Brown and stuff. I don't particularly fancy currants, so...

Smell-> 3 (Very much like any blackcurrant juice you can just get from anywhere around.)
Taste-> 3 (Smells and tastes like blackcurrants. Duh. XD Somewhat bitter blackcurrants.)
Appearance-> 3 (Looks the same as lemon tea.)

Chamomile tea

Chamomile tea naturally contains no caffeine (at least the kind I'm drinking doesn't) because its not brewed from Camellia sinesis at all. They use Matricaria recutita instead, the German chamomile plant. It has somewhat of an opposite effect of most teas. Its for people who have insomnia and anxiety, because it contains a mild relaxant and may have slight sleep-inducing effects. I drink this on days where I feel okay and also I drink it at night sometimes if I can't get to sleep. It doesn't seem to work for me, but it tastes okay and smells pretty apple-like, so its fine with me. Oh and it seems to work well if you have a smelly aftertaste in your mouth, even after brushing your teeth in the morning. (Like I do! Somehow the toothpaste can't get rid of the dryness and bleghness...) So I drink it on some mornings too. And Wiki says it can help for Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS). It seems to work for me but I haven't really experimented with it. Though I must say its quite good for your mouth in the morning especially.

I prefer Chamomile for its medicinal effects. I think its very good if you have bad breath no matter how hard you brush or how much toothpaste you use...

Smell-> 3 (Mild, somewhat like apples maybe? Pretty ok to smell.)
Taste-> 3 (Its very mild and it has a little bit of an oily (just a little!) texture and plain taste. It just slides down your gullet.)
Appearance-> 4 (Looks more tan than Camellia teas. Pretty good-looking. XD)

Peppermint tea

I think the kind I'm drinking is manufactured from the peppermint plant. Too lazy to look up a scientific name and all that. I don't really like it, because it totally doesn't taste minty! But it does work on bad breath somewhat. I'm glad I ran out though, because I don't fancy it much.

Smell-> 3 (Smells herbal. Kind of like... I can't describe it. Its an okay sort of smell.)
Taste-> 2 (Tastes pretty funny... I don't really like it.)
Appearance-> 3 (Looks generic too. Its somewhat brownish.)

Peach/Mango infused tea

The smell is great, just like the name suggests. But unfortunately the taste doesn't seem to carry forward into the tea. Maybe I'm brewing it wrong? But oh well, its pretty good for the smell. My guess is that this would contain caffeine as well.

Smell-> 5 (Fruity! It smells exactly like how the fruit components should. But the peach fragrance comes out alot stronger than the mango in my opinion.)
Taste-> 2 (Black tea-ish. Not what you'd expect from the pleasant smell.)
Appearance-> 3 (Generic.)

Rosehip/Hibiscus tea

Surprisingly, it tastes very sour. It smells of dried flowers, though not fragrant, somewhat more bitterish on the smell. Its good if you add honey, but otherwise its way too sour to drink with a straight face. It makes pink tea. XD Which looks pretty good but somewhat like fever medicine at the same time.

Smell-> 3 (Pretty ok, but smells too dried for me. I'd prefer fresh rose flowers. Those smell wow.)
Taste-> 2 (4 with honey. But add too much honey and it tastes horrible, honestly. Decide how much honey you want based on your personal preference if you decide to try this tea.)
Appearance-> 3 (Fever medicine! But if you like pink you might fancy the appearance more than I did.)

Jasmine Tea

Its VERY bitter, I believe this is the kind that you get in Chinese restaurants. I probably overbrewed it though, I tend to do that with all teas I drink... Personal preference, I need to overbrew it to get the taste out... But its somewhat good for the smell, which is fragrant and somewhat like the flower its named after.

I once had this stupid idea of mixing Sencha (green tea) and this Jasmine tea to get jasmine-infused green tea. XD If you're brave enough to try it then go ahead. Be sure to inform me of the results. Hehehehe.

Smell-> 4 (Jasmine-like. Go to Botanic Gardens or something and smell some Jasmine. Hey, its everywhere.)
Taste-> 1 (Bitter. >_< Not mildly bitter, either. I try not to drink it cos I don't like the taste much. But yeah like I said, I might've overbrewed it.)
Appearance-> 4 (Looks quite khaki. I do quite like the colour.)

And that concludes this very long and probably very boring thing. I don't blame you if you didn't read it properly. =D I probably would've skimmed through if I came across it elsewhere. Oh well, it felt good to write something long and pointless. Blogging is so therapeutic.

Oh if you want to give these a try I can spare a few teabags for you... (If I see you in school or something perhaps?) But I doubt anyone would. (Prove me wrong! XD)

19 voices in my head...

2008-08-30T12:28:00.008+08:00

Only 18 of them I can trust.

No matter how hard you try, sometimes greater powers don't want you to succeed.

You are insignificant, tugged and pushed around by the universe.

Failure is not the enemy, and not other people either...

You are your own victim, judge and murderer.

Thoughts are the most agonizing weapons out there.

Let happiness leak from wounds inflicted by the self.

When something under your control backfires.

Because things that aren't start the chain reaction.

Where sleep has failed to shut the voices up.

And waking up makes them yell louder.

A genocide of dreams, where nightmares arise from the corpses.

Drifting on a sea of liquid chamomile, trying to escape on my failing lifeboat.

Relying on chemical solace and the placebo effect.

When emotions, positive and negative, catalyse acidic rage.

But I get pulled under the stifling tides of crushing anger.

Drawn in by a whirlpool that I've set spinning into action...

Human awareness is the worst thing that's ever happened to me.

And the ending of it all might just be the best.

HOW can the future outweigh the past?

When both are doomed to futility.

P.S. Its not a poem. Don't know what it is. Don't tag if you want to comfort me, you'll only make me feel worse.

Edit: But typing this made me feel better, so thanks for reading it.

Teachers' Day

2008-08-29T15:18:00.004+08:00

Went back to JJ for Teachers' Day, along with Wai Chuen, Pamela, Qingpei and Shuqing... And Qingpei's friends, as well as Justin from S11 and Zhinian from S3 (I think they're friends of friends...)

The celebration was a little too loud and rowdy for my tastes, but its nice that they got the food catered and set up round dining tables in the hall. The decor was okay I guess, it looked quite restaurant-like, but it was pretty chaotic also, since everyone was scrambling to give the teachers their presents...

Ha, since there were 4 of us (from S02, except Waichuen who went to find someone...) there, we each took 1 subject tutor (and Pam took 2! Wow) and gave them a present on the behalf of the class. Pamela got Ms Lin and Mr Suren, Qingpei got Ms Lum, Shuqing gave to Ms Lai and I gave to Ms Loh. Ya then we stuffed Mr Chai's in his locker cos we could'nt find him. =/

Yeah, Ms Loh was quite happy so it made me happy. But like Qingpei said, after you give a gift, it feels somewhat awkward because there's nothing else to say.

A: "Hello! Happy ____ Day!"
B: "Oh, thanks thanks!"
A hands B the gift.
A: "... Okay."
B: "... Okay."

Okay.

Its even worse when you give to teachers, because they're eating with other teachers and you dunno if you should also wish the other teachers or not. >_<>=D

Yep. There was supposed to be class outing in the afternoon, but I guess I SMSed everyone too late. (I did it yesterday, which was like, really quite last minute.) Most people already had plans that day, so in the end the class outing was reduced to three people eating at Cafe Cartel@IMM...

... which has very delicious food, by the way. Affordable and filling too. And there's a free flow of bread, FANtastic! The peach tea is pretty nice too, even though I think its a little bit too sweet. I sound like a health-conscious auntie. =/

Oh well. We had fun though. Took pictures, though all are candid so I shall not post them here, for Shuqing and Qingpei's benefit. XD (And mine, for one of the pictures. =( )

And we saw a rat. XD Some guy dumped it into the dustbin (!!!) though, because, well, I guess rats are unsightly to most shoppers... It made me very sad. The rat was actually quite cute, but the way it squeaked... That poor thing must've been spooked. But then again, dustbin?? Its like... Meh. The thing can crawl out easily... Its neither practical nor kindly to dump it in there, I guess. Though to be fair, guess there's no other alternatives. Carrying a rat halfway across a shopping center to some ulu place would be exceedingly weird.

But yeah. After lunch, we went to check and write down the iceskating rates at Fuji Ice Palace. Turns out students get a discount with their student pass, and they have a discount on the discounted rate on Wednesdays. XD Ya but I dunno whether the class will be interested. But oh well, check also no harm done...

Just hope the next outing works out better... Perhaps if it was planned earlier, hopefully the turnout will be better too.

At least I learnt something. Two years ago I would've never helped organise an outing at all...

Singlehood and Sadness

2008-08-28T19:32:00.004+08:00

On one hand, I don't want to get married... (Not to a man either, mind you. =/ ) I think its tying yourself down. And I guess I haven't found anyone suitable yet. Not that anyone would love me in a romantic way, which is perfectly fine with me. But how will I live alone if I don't even know how to cook, or what my special purpose in the world is?

flakk: "All your friends would've been married by then."
Me: "I'll get a cat."
flakk: "It'll be pretty lonely coming home to a cat everyday."
Me: "I'll deal with it."
(My mind: He has a point. =/ )

On the other hand, we learn about 'ageing population' and 'replacement rate' in Human Geog... It makes you feel guilty that you're contributing to it, no matter how subtly your actions affect the outcome of the greater whole. But then again, what is the purpose of me getting married if its only to procreate? I'm not some sex machine. -___-

Alot of people: "Ageing population leh! Have to do your part... What type of Geog student are you?"
Me: *sarcastic look*

What to do. Be selfish or serve the greater good?

Selfish.
Serve.
Selfish.
Serve.
BE SELFISH. <---

Maybe I won't even live long enough to decide.

I don't know why, but I feel very depressed today again... Coincidentally, the moon is at its 'waning crescent' phase. (Its hardly visible, "7% of full".) I really think my mood is tied to it... I feel horrible for no good reason. Its just one of those days where everything's giving off bad voodoo, and you're trying not to be controlled by some greater force or something.

But more logically, I'm probably worried about the class outing tomorrow, and also Teachers' Day...

Ten thousand things could go wrong, one could go right. Everything stays alive for that one ray of hope. Its folly, but its optimism.

Testtube Steak

2008-08-26T13:12:00.003+08:00

Yesterday, flakk told me that they figured out how to grow meat in vitro (in the lab). I believed him (just barely), but I wanted to see the article(s) for myself, so I did a little researching...

http://www.newsdesk.umd.edu/scitech/release.cfm?ArticleID=1098

http://www.local6.com/news/4851623/detail.html

http://www.slate.com/id/2142547/

There's alot more, so use Google if you're interested. =/

There's now a whole new meaning for the term 'mock meat'... Apparently they culture the meat from cells harvested from poultry, fish and other farm animals. They induce the few cells (maybe even 1 cell could do the trick!) that they collect to divide and differentiate to create 'grown' meat, taking advantage of living cells' capability to divide to form new cells. But I doubt its been done commercially yet, though the article says they did manage to culture fish for astronauts.

Ok. Some of you might have reacted the way I did: "Eurgh, YUCKS."

But apparently this meat has some benefits. The article claims that consumers will no longer have to deal with growth hormones and other chemicals that some farmers may inject into 'ordinarily raised' farm animals to get them to grow fatter and give a higher meat yield. (Which made me wonder whether the chemicals they use to propagate the meat will affect human health or not... Is it just as bad??? Will the meat reduce the occurrence of food scares, or give rise to more of them?)

And secondly, cultured meat consumes less natural resources as well, and produces less pollution, since you're basically just growing muscle, and there's no 'wastage' on the skeleton, excretement, organs, etc of the animal... This helps to save the environment. Solution to world hunger, anyone? (Since I guess you could produce meat more cheaply, using less resources... Though how much the meat itself would cost for consumers remains a question. And also, the cost of the lab equipment and technology that's needed might have to be considered too...)

And you can control the nutrient content in it far easier, adding more of the good stuff and taking away the bad. Heck, I guess you could even tailor your meat to suit your personal taste... O_o After all, taste is just molecules reacting with your taste receptors. Change the proportions of those molecules, and I guess you'd change the taste.

Finally, some vegeterians might find it a more acceptable to eat the cultured meat, since its theoretically not as 'alive' as 'true' meat, I guess... And also, it'll probably eradicate (or reduce) the amount of factory farming that's going on in the world. Then perhaps people like me will no longer face conflict between loving the taste of meat, and loving the sight of animals...

Which makes me wonder... I don't really know if cells can be considered alive in the traditional sense... Like, how do you define life? (Like, a personal definition. Not something you kope from Wiki.)

Are bacteria (and even more interestingly, are viruses) living particles? Are animals 'alive' if they're in a vegetative state? Where would that place a few cells of cultivated lamb muscle? Personally I'd say they're hardly alive. They can't feel pain, they can't comprehend (not even at the level of an ordinary animal) and they can't reproduce (sexually, at least...) But I don't know how eating these little cells would feel, still... If not for the 'meat' part, then for the 'testtube' part... What about you? What's your personal definition of life?

And (much much much much) less importantly, I wonder if meat tastes the same when its not supplied with blood... Hmm.

I wonder if I'll try the in vitro meat if/when it becomes commercially available... It'll be a strange experience, that's for sure... But we've already started tampering with genes, zygotes and stuff like that; I think that its really not such a big surprise that we're already working towards growing meat. Might as well give it a try, I guess, for the fun of it... I guess it might not taste as alien as it sounds.

Digestive woes

2008-08-25T17:32:00.005+08:00

I've been eating very unhealthily these few days.

Yesterday I ate fried rice for lunch. I didn't want to eat fried rice again for dinner, so I ate bread. Little did I know, it was MILK-enriched bread. And I'm lactose intolerant. So I suffered greatly today as my digestive system reacted horribly to the milk... My mood and stomach were both totally killed in the morning. It still hurts somewhat now... And I'm hungry. XD

Two days ago I had fried chicken, fried fish slices, and some oily black chicken soup.

Three days ago I had fried chicken as well as some instant noodles for dinner... I added carrots and bai chai to the noodles in an attempt to remain health-conscious, but it just doesn't feel sufficient... And also, I put in the little packets of additives. Aww.

The day I went to Haw Par Villa (eh? Was it 4, 5 or 6 days ago?), it was more instant noodles. With a dead fly inside. XD (No, I didn't eat it. But I saw it... And went ahead and ate the food. =/ )

Today, at 11-ish am, I ate the magnum opus of the fastfood industry- The McChicken. -_- With fries, and the too-sweet (in my opinion) green tea that McDonalds sells.

I think, for the rest of the week, I'll try my best to eat smarter. Tomorrow I shall have lunch in school after Maths. I shall try the chicken rice stall's poached fish soup that Qingpei recommended.

On Friday, I might eat lunch in school again. I hope to try the mock char siew that the vegeterian stall sells before I graduate, so Friday will likely be a prime opportunity for this.

It makes me wonder... With so many dining choices out there, which will we favour in the future?

Aka, sacrifice convenience for health, or sacrifice health for convenience?

I would personally opt for the former, though I'm no Gordon Ramsey and I'm probably gonna live alone in the future... My cat can't help me cook. So either I should pick up some cooking skills quick, or find a good haunt with healthy food near my future home, hire a maid/chef (ha, like I'll be that rich!), or train my cat how to cook healthfood. =/ Or do all of these...

Or am I being overly health-conscious? Honestly, its very difficult not to be, what with all the food scares going around. I once got an email saying that aspartame causes cancer... Now I try not to buy sweets with artificial sweeteners anymore... (Disclaimer: I don't know if its true that aspartame is carcinogenic, or how many sweets with artificial sweeteners contain aspartame.)

See what I mean? At least for myself, I'd rather not risk it, even though this Aspartame nonsense may just turn out to be some rumour. Its tough to validate the claims when you don't have the capability to test the food yourself. Unless you consider eating it, then waiting 30 years to see if you'll develop cancer as testing the food. =/

Better safe than sorry, I guess. And also, its not like I don't pig out on enough artifical flavourings and preservatives already. (I eat sweets almost daily, for example. Most likely at least four times a week.)

It makes you think what we'll be eating in the future... Personally, I see three ways (but it may not be limited to just three ways, I am only one person after all, and other people might have their own ideas about this...) which the food industry could progress towards.

Will we see a Hippy phenomenon, where everyone is bent on gorging on as much health food as possible? In this scenario, the health food industry would be extremely popular (and lucrative) because everyone is becoming more and more conscious about what they eat and they're ~~zealously obsessed with~~ increasingly concerned about living a healthy lifestyle...

In other words... "For breakfast, tofu. For lunch, organic lettuce. For dinner, wheat germ with sugar-free yoghurt for dessert, designed to maximise the glow of your chakras." (Yes I came up with that quote myself, explaining why its so crappy.)

Or will we do the exact opposite, and end up turning our dinnerplates into toxic waste disposal sites and biological hazard zones? In this dystopian (at least to me?) rendition of the future, people will start to opt for convenience foods more often, in order to save time and keep up with their hectic lifestyles. And improvements in technology make producing convenience foods far more cheaper and easier. People also place more faith into biotechnological techniques, like genetic engineering, to increase crop yield and possibly meat yield from animals, and reduce the amount of seeds, bones... Improve taste... Stuff like that.

To illustrate this concept... I remember coming across a cartoon once, where a waiter was talking to an upper-class lady...

"What would you like to order, Ma'am? We have cancer-causing foods, genetically-modified foods and foods banned outside the US." (Or something like that...)

Or, even better... Will we do both of these simultaneously, depending on our mindset, amount of free time, individual choice, etc? Imagine fast food firms warring against organic farms warring against factory farms, or something to that effect... Fighting for customers, of course.

Heh, I just imagined a hippy bashing Ronald McDonald on the head with a tree. XD

"Peace out, man!" (Okay, I just realised that I'm damn lame. -_-)

Either extreme case sounds pretty creepy, though. I just hope that I can eat apples in the future without them coming in powder form, or having the organic ones cost 100 bucks each, or something...

Disclaimer: Even though I may sound slightly biased towards the 'organic' side in my general personality, mannerisms and writing format, I'm actually a "moderator". Okay I coined that term up myself and I realise that it means something else... XD

What I mean is, I eat stuff in moderation. I pig out on candy alot, mind you, but I sort of try to balance it out by incorporating fruits, veg, meat, carbo etc into my diet as I see fit. I don't know if its very healthy, but balance sounds both physically and mentally satisfiying to me, so...

Basically, sugar pleases my tastebuds, while green tea and lettuce (versus, say, coffee and coleslaw?) make my health-conscious brain shut up.

Meme! (koped from Jin)

2008-08-24T01:45:00.006+08:00

I'm so bored with studying Geog and Bio. I need a break. Yes, another break. XDXD I've been taking alot of those lately.

Where is your school?
There's a place in Singapore, where we learn to be sexy (or something like that). That's JJC!

Where were you born?
Singapore. Also in Thompson Medical Center I think, like YongJin. -_-

Where do you live now?
Deep in the recesses of Clementi.

Who do you live with?
My family. I shall spare you the painful details.

Do you go for remedials?
Not really. =/ But for Maths I think I need them. XD

What is your fav color?
Green, definitely.

What is your fav flower?
I love them all. =P But I like jasmine quite alot. The aroma rocks. Its really calming and stuff.

Do you currently have someone on your mind?
Almost everyone seems to be having problems nowadays. Myself included...
But nothing romantic is going on up here! (That sounds so innuendo. XD)

What is your biggest regret?
Not spending more time with my grandfather/auntie while I had the chance.

What room are you in?
My bedroom. =) Its comfy and my bed is nearby. Which is good because I feel tired.

Do you exercise regularly?
Only for PC.

What is your fav food?
Hmm... Probably fruits? Or meat. Depending on my mood. (Its going to be hard turning vegeterian...)

If you could live anywhere where would you live?
Somewhere isolated from most civilisation, though a few people is fine... (yet perhaps with enough technology at the same time.)

How many kids do you want?
None... Maybe one. =X But I'll have to adopt one because...

Do you want to get married?
... I don't.

Could you ever be in the military?
Looks like I'll find out the hard way next year. =/

Do you like to dance?
Its fun, but I'm not very good... I do it in private sometimes though. XD But I guess now that I've said that, its not really in private anymore. -_-

Do you believe in God?
I don't deny the existence of deities, but I feel that I'm not ready for a religion. At least not yet... I need to learn more about each religion's belief system before venturing into this...

Do you pray?
I used to...

What was the last thing you wished for?
Probably world peace or something silly and idealistic. I haven't wished for stuff in ages, though. Not officially, at least.

What is your goal in life?
To learn more, feel more and experience as much of the world as I can. How cliche. -_-

Do you trust easily?
I'd say yes. But its easy to lose my trust too...

What are your plans for the remainder of the year?
Survive the 'A' levels.

How old do you plan to be when you get married and have kids?
Infinity. Divided by 0. Wahaha. -_-

Describe yourself in 5 words?
Idealistic, Balanced, Opinionated, Hard-nosed, Considerate. (Mostly.)

Is it ok to sleep around as long as nobody finds out?
I don't think so... But its the person's choice. I would'nt do it, all I need is myself. Hehehe. -____-

What would you class yourself as?
Indecisive treehugger. =/

Do you think you're intelligent?
Maybe? I think I am, quite. But not above average just yet. Or, maybe I'm just good at memorising stuff. Which is pretty sian...

Anything annoying you at the moment?
Yes. But I won't elaborate. And the list would probably be too extensive to fit here anyway. =/

Are you religious?
I'd like to be, but I don't feel very ready yet. Though life without a religion is fine thus far, though sometimes I feel guilty about leaving Christianity behind......

Would you date someone 15 years older than you?
I would probably not date anyone of any age. =/

Would you go out with an ugly person if they were really rich and gave you everything?
Same as above. (But perhaps replace 'age' with 'looks/status' or whatever.)

Do you lead people on?
I've sort of considered myself a follower at most. Perhaps a behind-the-scenes leader. But never an up-front type of leader.

Do you have/ever had an STD?
I hope not. Assuming I didn't get one through sexual means.

Get along with your parents?
Not really. But we still talk to each other sometimes. Its good enough, and I can still feel their love. I guess...

Do you think you're hot?
Sheesh, no. I'm of average appearance, at best.

Are you a hard worker?
I guess. But I'm pretty easily distracted. =X

Do you have a short temper?
I'd say yes, in general. It depends on my mood, as usual. And in some cases, the person talking to me and also the 'trigger'.

What accent do you think is hot?
Er... I kind of like British accents. Undercrackers. XD But they're not very hot. O_o

Would you rather go out with someone really fat or way too thin?
It doesn't really matter, does it? Though if I really had to make a choice, I'd go for someone of average weight. Though neither really bothers me. Oh whatever la. -_-

Have you ever been to a psychiatrist?
No. But I've always wanted to give it a go...

Do you make new friends easily?
The question is being sarcastic with me. It is mocking me... I am disappointed.

Do you get jealous easily?
Quite. But it depends on what we're comparing. If its something like physical appearance, then no.

What do you think of vegans?
I support them, but I don't know if I have enough backbone and determination to join their ranks... Oh and some of them are really quite extreme. They can't eat beeswax and honey. O_o Since those are animal products... I support vegeterianism though, but I don't always support all forms of veganism or being vegan or whatever its called.

Do you own a credit card?
No. I bet my expenditure would go through the roof if I did, though...

Did you go to private school?
Government all the way. Bleh, that sounded so... Propaganda-like. XD

Have any secret fetishes?
Hehehe.................................
No

Is there something you are keeping secret from everyone?
Alot of things. But I'd like for them to remain secret, so...

What would you change about yourself if you could?
I remember that other Meme ended with this same question. So I shall repeat my answer. Not cut and pasted though, since I'm lazy. But I think this is it:
"Certain negative aspects of my personality. A perfect personality is worth striving for, though its obviously impossible to achieve."

Yeah. I realised that Memes are usually not very original. There's alot of repeated questions. -_-

Lucid Dreaming Attempt #2

2008-08-23T12:21:00.005+08:00

It failed, because I wanted to wake up at 5 am and then start preparing my mind to dream lucidly, before going back to sleep... In the end, I woke up at 1 am cos someone came in to put chocolate on the table. (We store chocolate in my room, because it seems to be the coolest room in the house. Temperature-wise. =P)

Since it was too early to start my mental preparations, I went back to bed.

And my alarm didn't ring at 5 am, so I woke up at 10.30 am instead (without falling back asleep afterwards!)... Don't know why, either I was too deaf in my sleep, or the handphone alarm malfunctioned.

I had alot of non-lucid dreams though. Like one that was really retarded. I dreamt that I was in Totally Spies. -_- (Its a cartoon.)

And there was one that was pretty nightmarish, but I forgot what it was all about. Which is probably for the better... I think it involved some gore.

There's two others, but I forgot what they were about. Its so amazing how your memories of dreams tend to be as fleeting as the dreams themselves... And I don't know why I had so many dreams last night. I've never had as many as 3 in a night before, let alone 4... It might be because I kept waking up in the middle of the night. They say you only remember dreams if you wake up in-between them (or at the end, if you choose to look at it that way, since a dream obviously ends once you wake up.)

I'm contemplating whether I should try the technique again tonight, cos I feel really tired now. Not sure if its from attempting the technique or sleeping for close to 11 hours... Oh well, there's a cup of hot lemon tea waiting for me. Woohoo. I saved lemon tea on my tea cycle for the weekend, cos I know that I'd have alot of studying to do these two short days... Geog, Bio and Maths, yay. -_-

P. S. My tea cycle is basically how I drink tea per week. I have about 7 kinds in the cupboard now. (Peach/Mango, Rosehip/Hibiscus, Chamomile, Green, Lemon, Blackcurrant, Peppermint.) So I rotate between them in a weekly cycle, drinking one or more cups of each per day, but only using one teabag a day. Yeah. I wonder if I should do a teavaluation of all the teas I've drunk before, because I discovered that I really love tea. =P

Edit: The lemon tea was great. I feel totally awake now. The aroma is amazing. Beta-limonene works wonders. And freshly brewed lemon tea tastes SO MUCH BETTER than the processed one... Its definitely my favourite kind of fruit-infused tea thus far. Better than blackcurrant and peach-mango, which have a fruity smell but not much fruity taste. Lemon tea has both. Great...

Reality? I think its overrated.

2008-08-21T17:35:00.004+08:00

But I might be wrong, so...

Yes, anyway, I tried to dream lucidly a few days ago. I failed.

According to Wikipedia (so as not to make any mistake with the definition), a lucid dream is "a dream in which the person is aware that he or she is dreaming while the dream is in progress, also known as a conscious dream. When the dreamer is lucid, he or she can actively participate in the dream environment without any of the limitations that otherwise would feel natural to persons who incorrectly believe they are in the "real" waking world." (That's a mouthful. Kudos to you if you didn't skip it, because I would've simply skimmed through it. -_-)

Yes, that means you can pig out on all the chocolate you want, without making your jeans burst at the seams... (Personally I'd really love to do this.)
You can travel all over the world without wasting a single cent.
You can fly around and jump off cliffs... without the insurance and hospital fees.
You can murder and torture people you hate. ;) (Without going to jail, or having to worry about being found out.)
And you can make love to the people you don't... (Without contraceptives! Zzz)

Isn't the human mind amazing? You can do anything you want now, and no one will be there to stop you. No police, no mother-in-law, no long-lost son, etc. Too bad lucid dreams are only temporary. Sooner or later, you'll have to wake up and face the sadness of reality again. Boohoo.

But then you can always fall asleep once more. Unless you're not tired. Then wait til you're tired. =/

By now, you might be thinking, "Wa, so good meh? Got such thing meh? Sure must be very powderful then can hor."

Apparently, yes, there really is such thing meh, and I guess its scientifically proven, based on Readers' Digest and Wikipedia. And anyone can dream lucidly, but it rarely happens on its own. You have to induce it. But whether you want to is another question la. Personally I tried it for 1 night and I failed. I had a non-lucid dream though. (The painful irony...) I'm gonna try it again during the weekend. Hopefully I won't fail at it again... =/

If you want to know how to induce a lucid dream, then click here for the nitty gritty details. Please tell me if you succeed where I've failed. =P

There's also some devices that can help people dream lucidly, like this fancy google thing that flashes a red light into your eyes when it detects rapid-eye movement (REM) that signals a dream is approaching. Apparently you can see the red light in your dream (perhaps as a laser beam or a pair of car headlights or something) and then realise that you're dreaming because you remembered to pay attention to red lights while you were awake.

I wonder whether reality is really all that great. There's so many restrictions, physics-based or otherwise. I've always wanted to teleport, for example. (Haha, laugh all you want.)

But I can't.

But now I can! In my sleep! Yay.

What's so good about reality anyway? It might be more 'permanent' to some, but you're going to die sooner or later. There goes the permanence of it all... (I hope I nailed that word.) Not to mention that you only spend a fraction of your time in there. The rest is more or less channeled towards maintaining your thoughts, dreams and other miscellaneous mental processes. Your own private reality away from reality.

So, why not opt for another temporary world, where the only limiting factor is your imagination? If it was me, I'd choose a world where I would not be limited by laws, regulations and all sorts of rules. Even if it isn't 'real'. You can keep your real world, with all its gravity and time and stress and stuff.

Call me childish then. =/ But really, would'nt it be great to be able to control everything and have it go your way? Even if its only for a few hours every night, it'll be a great way to escape on your one-man/woman yacht of surreality... And hey, maybe you're already doing it. What if this world doesn't exist? Maybe you're hallucinating. You might even be dreaming now!

I might just be a figment of your imagination. A rather annoying one. =) Though I really hope this lucid dreaming thing works out. Assuming its not some farfetched thing. (Unlikely though, since its been scientifically-validated...)

It'll motivate me to sleep earlier everyday, just so that I can get back to my Ferrero Rocher and Cadbury. The thought makes me want to fall asleep now... Even if it doesn't work out, I can't say that I didn't try. And I definitely can't say the process wasn't fun. XD

The Gates of Hell

2008-08-20T16:33:00.004+08:00

We bought tickets to the "10 Courts of Hell" at Haw Par Villa. I went with Byan again today. Admission to the park itself is free, but going to hell costs 1 dollar. (XD I love phrasing it that way.) So yes, we went to hell. We both took pictures, but I deleted mine cos they're seriously very creepy and gory. I remember how I went to Haw Par Villa as a kid (a younger kid, rather) and I was fine with the Courts of Hell. I can't believe that I'm grossed out by them now, 5 odd years later.

Tada. "Gates of Hell". But then my command of Simplified Chinese is deplorable. Let alone Traditional Chinese.

At first glance they look cute and cuddly. Then you realise they're holding weapons. And they were killing each other in a rather gory fashion in another portion of this exhibit. Eegh. I didn't wanna take a shot of that cos it was really very bloody. Got one part where a rabbit was biting a rat or something. -_-

I love periwinkles. XD

Earth Diety. Why did I take a photo of him? Because he's the Earth Diety. =)
Lady White Snake. The other is probably the Green Carp demoness or something. Forgot her name... Its a Chinese folk story.
I bet this is taboo. =/ But the damage has already been done. I hope the nether world spares me...

Xin Xiang Shi Cheng. I think it roughly translates to "If you put your heart into everything, you're sure to succeed." (Of course, not if you're literally putting your heart into everything, since this IS "hell"... Which actually makes it possible.)
Two bridges to paradise for the good people. One's gold, the other's silver.

Chinese cavemen have good taste. ;)

Sunbathers... I love terrapins!
Rooftop or something.
The six paths to reincarnation after one has served their sentence in hell. One path leads back to humanity (top left). There's also bones (bottom left), birds (middle left), fish (bottom right I think) and two other paths that I didn't take note of.I like this emblem. It looks so mystic.
In the dark. Reminds me of Archangel Tyrael from Diablo II. XD

A moth of sorts.
The bird was taken at a better angle (its head is more visible, I guess) in this shot...

... but its sharper in this shot! I hate it when this happens to me, when repeat photos each have their pros but they both look like crap when placed individually.
The water is mucky, yet its beautiful isn't it? Sort of. -_-
We saw this stray cat somewhere near the Journey to the West exhibit. Its cute-a-licious. Lick. XD Meow. MEOW. MEOW. I love cats love me. -_______-

Some lizard. Its cute too. =P
This isn't cute. I was holding back my laughter when I first saw it. XD And I tactfully censored the hideous nipples, for your viewing pleasure. =)

Guanyin (Goddess of Mercy).

I like this shot alot. Its overexposed, but IMO that's what makes it nice right? The ants look like they're glowing. I'm sorry for hurting your eyes, though...

This pic is quite freaky. Imagine if everyone had poultry heads on their shoulders. Urgh.
Some ant statue. Its fancy.

I love this pic alot because it turned out rather melancholy in my opinion. Of course, it was super zoomcropped. My lens is too small to zoom extensively so I used my camera to digitally edit the shot. I use the zoomcrop tool alot, to 'get close' to birds and insects and other stuff that would otherwise scuttle or run or fly away.
Tan Sanzhang from Journey to The West, resisting seduction attempts from a spider demoness. She wants to eat his flesh. I bet that turns you on. XD (No, just kidding. Cannibalism is bad.)

Obviously zoomcropped.
Nezha. Too bad he looks androgynous in the pic. -_-

Ants eat bird poo. I learnt something new today.

The good news: It broke into flight just as I captured the shot. The bad news: My camera wasn't set on hi-speed shooting or the appropriate shutter speed.
Something that looks like an ant and a spider spliced together. No idea what it is.
Yes, they're real live birds. =P

I love how hardy some species of plants can be.

Fancy? I love how the insect or whatever drills such neat holes into the leaf. What a fussy eater. XD

Spider. Its butt is facing me.

Byan showed me his MP3 made from some shiny, blackish material. So, I took out this keychain (the chain fell off so I kept the bobble part in my pencil box. XD) and showed him. You can see the camera lens in the reflection in the material. XD (I think its haematite but I'm not sure.)

Hydrant. They labelled it, which I thought was both comical and unecessary. So...
Yes, it was carrying this... insect corpse (?) back to the nest. I was very lucky to capture this.
Guess what this is.
XDXD This old man amused me greatly. He looked like he was doing a 'superman' but in reality he's struggling cos someone's invading the Dragon Palace.

Another scene from Lady White Snake.
Panda cubs. The real ones are MUCH MUCH MUCH MUCH MUCH cuter. These look rather horrific, in fact. Yuck.
Its some house in HPV. Not sure what was inside and I didn't dare to open it, so I just took a few pics in the area nearby.

I was aiming to capture a bird far off but I got a rather enigmatic pic of this statue instead.
There, these two buggers. Flying around, teasing me for 10+ minutes. Jeez. And all I had to show for it was this poor shot of them. I love this species of bird alot, but I have no idea what its called. The colours are pretty though, eh?
I had to make some sacrifices. Didn't want to swat it or chase it away, because I wanted to take the pic. (And also I have to live up to my reputation as a naturemonger...) My pinky is hairy, and so is the mosquito. -_- Yucks.
Can you see the spider silk?

Can you see the terrapin?
Can you see the fish?
Can you see that I'm being lame? -_-
I like these flowers. I think the plant's called Flame of the Forest? I forgot, and it doesn't matter anyway.
She was rather pretty but the lighting made her look very tai tai. XD

And that's all, folks. We spent about 4 hours going around Haw Par Villa (including a lunch of instant noodles at the restaurant there). I bought a shirt for 4 dollars (VERY VERY cheap) that looks quite strange and stuff.

P.S. I realise some of the shots should've been rotated. I was too lazy to do it, and it was more complicated to do so cos I 'protected' the shots on my camera and forgot to unprotect them before uploading. That means you can't use the 'shortcut' method to rotate pictures. So ya I'm lazy, yay.

After the rain

2008-08-18T16:11:00.010+08:00

-_- I went to take photos after it rained today... Yes, instead of properly focusing on my Geog.

Most of them suck cos I was tinkering with the camera functions and all that, yes... But ya I like some. And some are more of 'Look, I have..................." sort of photos, instead of 'artistic' photos or whatever.

Yes, anyway.

RARR

Super macro shot

It might be too bright. I apologize on behalf of your eyes. -_-
Yeah, there's a lawn gnome in there and he looks quite creepy. XD
Its my house. Yes, I know there's algae on the walls. -_- Its an old condo, ok?

This one is tough to guess. I think.
Yeah. Someone dripped white paint on it. By accident, hopefully.

My father set one of the doves free! Empty cage. =D
Hibiscus flower
Yeah this is a rather messy and useless sort of pic.
I like this. =)
Ginger plant

This is my favourite tree. It grows in a forest near my house, but its off-limits. I think its a rain tree. I like how it towers above the rest. Woohoo.
Yes, its rosehip and hibiscus tea. Yes, it has the colour of fever medicine.
I bet bet bet bet bet you can't guess what this is! If you do then I'll give you a smile. =)
I bet bet bet x10 you can guess what this is. -_-

Yes, that's an ant. Yes, it looks like dirt.
Yes, the black stuff inside the pitchers consists of insect corpses. Yes, its blurry. =/
The dove returned! Woohoo!
Yes, that's a bird. XDXD Too bad it looks like an ink splotch eh.
I love this pic alot. Its split rather nicely into three sections- The sky, humans and the forest.

Ignore the birdypoo in his watering dish. He does that all the time. -_- Yes, this is Fa Cai.

Boo! I bet that scared you. Ohyes.
Yes, birds shed alot. -_- The white stuff is down feathers... I hope.
That's about it. Au revoir. -_-

Diversity

2008-08-17T12:47:00.008+08:00

Penguins are seen by many as cumbersome and comical creatures, having as much grace on land as one would expect from the obese balls of blubber that they are. People laugh at how such a pudgy, flightless bird could possibly survive the rigors that they face daily in their natural habitats. But take a penguin and place it in cold water, and it is in its element. No one laughs at it anymore; they are stunned by its elegance and breakneck speed, as it moves against the whim of the tides, at one with its marine surroundings.

Along the Humboldt current, a stream of cold water that flows across a large portion of the West of the South American coast, various species of penguin thrive on the cornucopia of fish and krill, which in turn is sustained by the nutrients stirred up from the ocean bed by the Humboldt's chilly flows. The Humboldt current is a stream of cold water that flows Northwest-ward, all the way from Patagonia, the Southernmost region of South America, to the Galapagos islands along the sunny equator, which are embraced by the current as it meanders westward, diverted by the landmass that is Peru.

The path of the Humboldt Current

Humboldt, Magellanic and Galapagos penguins, among others, are opportunists, and they nest along the path of the Humboldt Current, sheltered from the worst of the pressures of life by forests, glaciers, rocky cliffs, with some even nesting in the coastal regions of the Atacama, the driest desert in the world. Talk about breaking free from stereotypes. These penguins certainly do it well, nesting in ludicriously dystopian regions to take advantage of the vibrantly abundant, utopian waters of the Humboldt.

Humboldt Penguin (Spheniscus humboldti)

But the penguins are not the only oddballs that can be found along the Humboldt's route. The Galapagos are home to many unique species, such as the Marine Iguana, the world's only lizard that can survive in a saltwater habitat. The lizard grips onto slippery rocks along the tide line, feeding on algae and seaweed, as it struggles against the crashing, explosive force of the waves and the chill of the water.

Marine Iguana (Amblyrhynchus cristatus)

13 (some say 14) species of finches, each suited to their own ecological niche, have evolved in a divergent manner from a single seedeating ancestor. These include the Vampire Finch, which, true to its name, feeds on the blood of other birds that nest in the Galapagos region, as well as the insectivorous Woodpecker Finch, which uses cactus spines and twigs (instead of a resilient beak like its namesake) to extract its prey from nooks and crannies in tree bark.

Woodpecker Finch (Camarhynchus pallidus)

The Galapagos Cormorant, isolated from mainland South America, has lost its ability to fly, much like its less successful Mauritian counterpart, the Dodo. Like the penguin, it is cumbersome on land, but shoots about in the water like a streamline missile, grabbing for individual fish amongst the vast schools supported by the nutrient-rich waters.

Flightless/Galapagos Cormorant (Phalacrocorax harrisi)

All of these might seem to us like strange and unorthodox creatures, who employ strange and unorthodox ways to survive, but to them they are just going about their everyday business, much like how a domestic cat would wait for its caregiver to offer it food. They have become so suited to their current mode of life that they would likely lose out to keen competitors and alert predators if they were placed in any other geographical region on Earth. They are true specialists and in some cases, extremophiles, scattered across some of the most inhospitable and hostile regions across the face of the planet.

I believe that this principle can be applied to humans. Some of us are different from the majority. The temperamental artist, the Einstein-esque scientific brainiac or the misunderstood activist, striving to make his/her cause known, are just three examples. Like the Flightless Cormorant, or the penguins of South America, they are a unique species nesting amongst the rabble of 'ordinary' seabirds. But they need their own special Galapagos to dwell within, and realise their full potential, where they can get away from the prying eyes and sharp tongues of critics and those who disapprove of their 'deviant behaviour'.

Putting these instances aside, we are all still different on a more subtle scale. Based on our appearance, interests, personality, talents (and the list goes on), we can safely say that no two humans are completely identical. Not even twins. The shy, Rabbit-like introvert; the showy, talkative Macaw of an extrovert; the bully who's behaviour can best be likened to the Great White Shark; and the vain, metrosexual Peacock, among many, many others. Perhaps even these rigid classifications are not extensive enough to highlight our diversity. Even among sharks, there are some who are friendlier, possibly more artistic, and some may even have a passion for, say, Chinese calligraphy, and so on. There are even many examples of so-called identical twins with radically different personalities.

Maybe it is time that we recognize how diverse human beings really are. Not everyone is suitable to be a doctor or a lawyer. There are lots of potential game designers, musicians, playwrights, zookeepers and, heck, taxidermists out there. We just have to look harder and embrace the vast variety that individual homo sapiens have to offer, instead of restricting each other's behaviour with harsh moral standards and wagging tongues and fingers. After all, despite their little quirks, we would'nt want the Flightless Cormorants and Vampire Finches to go extinct, now would we?

(Note: I tried my best to do research on the animal species for this blogpost. Pardon me if I made any errors, factual or otherwise. And also, this might appear to contradict hugely with my 'We're not special' post on Narcissism earlier. I still don't know what's my take on this issue. -_- But ya I hope you enjoyed this very long essay-like blogpost and found it interesting. And stuff. Feel free to generate your own thoughts on this issue, though, but don't force them upon me. I want to stay a Vampire Finch. =D)

All images obtained from Wikipedia.

Some Meme from Qingpei

2008-08-16T19:11:00.003+08:00

I guess I read the Meme on her blog, so I have to do it huh? Ya sorry I'm just so bored, and I like these Meme things quite alot. XD

A) People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs & replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

B) Tag 8 people to do this quiz & those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by. Continue this game by sending it to other people. (I shall just leave it here without tagging anyone cos I don't believe in chain-memes. =/)

1. Which anime character would you like to meet in real life if possible?
I don't know. =/ But I like that cat in that Anime that Wenjie showed us once. Forgot what its called. But that cat was cute. XD Really cute. I love cats.

2. What do you do before bedtime?
Watch TV/game (preferrably TV cos its more relaxing) and set the alarm for tomorrow (unless there's no school.)

3. What will your dream wedding be like?
Currently, one that doesn't exist. Being single for the win.

4. What is the city of your dreams and why?
Some city where people live on the branches of trees, and everyone is friends forever with all the plants and animals around them. <3 And the technology there is more advanced and environmentally-friendly than it is in our cities on Earth. So disgusting, and obviously it doesn't exist. On the physical plane. But it does exist in my head! So there.

5. Are you an introvert or extrovert?
Both, depending on the circumstance, my mood, the person I'm interacting with etc. Generally, social interactions exhaust me though. Physically. They're really tiring and stressful because you have to watch yourself all the time and try not to come across as strange or something. So I'd say I'm largely an introvert, especially if I haven't gotten to know the other party well.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
Both are great, but being loved feels better. Loving someone is nice though, cos you can sort of feel their happiness and stuff. But being loved actually makes you feel important, which I need alot. =/

8. If the person you secretly like is already taken, what would you do?
When it happens (as in, when I find someone to secretly like), I'll probably just accept it lor. Unless its a cat or something, then I'll fight for it! (Well, the question did say 'person'. =( )

9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
Prelims. And the idea of Narcissism. And also how I'm being more and more concerned about my appearance. Yucks. Oh and add my worries about my future to the list.

10. What is your favourite color?
Green, blue and black. Purple is also nice sometimes. But mostly, green.

11. Is being tagged fun?
I guess so... It depends very much on the nature of the tag. And also who the person is. ^_^

12. What do you want to be when you grow up?
Writer or a vet or a researcher or a teacher or something. I'm keeping my options open. I've never been a very decisive person anyway. -_-

13. Who are currently the most important people to you?
Kith and kin. And also I hope Pogey is doing okay... But he's not a person so... I hate it when they use the word 'people'. Animals are people too! In a sense. -_-

14. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
Talkative, caring, funny and also somewhat perverted. XD

15. What is something that you are looking forward to most lately?
Probably the break between Prelims and 'A' levels. Or 'A' levels and NS. Or maybe when (or if) I enrol into University.

16. What’s your favorite item of clothing?
I like jeans cos they're very generic and comfortable. Yay jeans.
I HATE underwear. XDXD (Ya sorry. -_- But its true, I've always felt that underwear is a little unnecessary. Hehe. All it does is itch you and stuff. XD)

17. What's better: to give or to receive?
Again, both are fantastic. But I'd rather receive. =X When you give, you're never sure whether the person will like it or not. If they don't then your effort more or less went down the plumbing.

18. What's the first thing you notice in people?
Possibly their personality, their body language and the clarity/volume/etc of their voice. From the way people speak, behave and carry themselves, you can really tell alot about them.

Oh and I won't mince my words. I also look at people's faces, especially their eyes. But ya I won't (or I'll try not to) diss you if you're not good-looking so ya. I'm not handsome either. -_-

19. Would you have 100% safe sex with a stranger for $10,000,000?
Wow, that's alot of money. XD Er... It depends. =X

20. If you could change something, what would It be?
Possibly certain negative aspects of my personality. A perfect personality is worth striving for, yet obviously impossible to achieve. Unfortunately...

Now as to who I tag for this, like I said you can do it if you want, yeah. I just did it cos I was bored of Reaction Kinetics and needed to reward myself for finishing Physical Chemistry. XD

Narcissism

2008-08-16T18:48:00.002+08:00

Oh no, help me, I'm becoming zi lian...

Just because I changed my hairstyle slightly. It still looks slightly like my old hairstyle. It doesn't even look fantastic or anything and I know it. But I keep staring at the mirror and I feel sort of an urge to take photos... OF MYSELF (instead of doves and plants and stuff.)

Argh! Stubid stubid stubid. No, Lu ZhengWen. (That sounds so yucks, I want an English name.) You're just another idiot out there with idealistic dreams, stop thinking you're so special.

I'm nothing special, just like everyone else. (No offense.)

I've always thought that WE'RE ALL nothing special as a species. We're just bipedal, (mostly) hairless monkeys with big brains and lots of smell receptor pseudogenes. All we're good at is polluting and killing. And watching TV. Narcissism is unfounded because 'nothing is impossible' is, in itself, an impossibility. We need to know our bloody limits.

And being humans, we won't realise that we're nothing special until we're humbled by our inevitable demise. (Which is obviously too late for us. But then 99% of the world's other species would most likely be happy that we're dead.) It might not happen now, or in 2012 but I believe we're gonna die off sooner or later. And then there'll be another narcissistic species out there after a few more million years, possibly evolved from ducks or something. And the cycle will repeat itself. We're just little bits of chemicals and water. We're not miracle-workers.

I will always believe that we're nothing special. Jeez. Now I'm reminded of the guy who wrote a speech in the form of a letter to Mother Nature, saying that there's huge flaws in the 'human design' and Mother Nature did a bad job 'constructing' us. Ungrateful.

(Sorry, this post came across as more angry-sounding than it was meant to be... And possibly hypocritical and extreme. You're advised to not take it to heart. And no, its not targeted at any specific person. In fact, I'm very likely guilty of narcissism also, in some ways. Its just some random thoughts I got after reading our GP prelim paper, and other GP compre passages.)

P.S. I like the word 'disconfabulated'. I think its made-up but it sounds nice. XD

A cloak of gossamer ebony

2008-08-15T14:52:00.001+08:00

I think I'm too free. When I got home I went to wiki 'centerparting' just to see whether there was an article. The answer is no, but I found one on hairstyles and I read it. It says there's such a thing as floor-length hair. So I went to do some Youtubing. XD

Biology...

2008-08-15T12:09:00.004+08:00

... was super long. I'm not sure who can do 9 questions (8 structured and 1 essay) PROPERLY in 2 hours. I nailed them all just as Ms Loh said "Stop writing.", but I'm not sure if I reached the level of doing them 'properly' yet.

I combed my hair into a sideparting. -_- Everyone says its *two-thumbs-up*/okay/nice/looks the same, and I think I'm going to keep it this way until further notice. I discovered that sidepartings are incredibly durable, compared to centerpartings, towards wind and sleep. Usually when I wake up, I look abit like Einstein... But today when I woke up, I hardly had to touch my hair at all. Fantastic. It actually takes less time to get ready than before, instead of more. And apparently it looks better?

I'm still not spiking my hair. =X Not anytime soon, anyway. But I might try it just for the thrill. XD Ya I've never spiked my hair before ohsosadomg. Ya cry for me lor.

And no, I didn't use any wax or gel still. Just water. I miss the smell of Sam's wax. XDXD (Okay that sounded quite R/A. I'm sorry for putting that image into your head. If you don't get which direction I'm nudging at then its probably for the better.) But that stuff really smells great, its so sweet-smelling, like flowers or something. I was sniffing my fingers repeatedly after the class phototaking. -__-

I wonder if they put opium or inhalants in wax. I seem addicted. XD Seriously, I want to smell it again...

(Yes, time for a diversion from wax addiction...)

If you think a sideparting is bad then
1) Its my hair, not your's.
2) The majority would agree that a centerparting is worse. -_-
3) Need to demolish it soon anyway, for NS.

Oh and its my *favourite* festival again. Hungry Ghost festival woohoo. Smelly, ash-laden air and spooky rumours of the guy next door who saw something from the nether world, or the girl who turned into a pontianak. I *love* Hungry Ghost festival! Its so *FANTASTIC*! And I just love how people are burning paper money near our school. -_- Granted, its convenient to burn it near their houses, and also its a long-standing tradition or something, but its also pollutive and the wind direction wasn't very much in our favour just now while I was waiting for the bus. I swear, the burnt ash smell still lingers even though I'm back at home. But what can you do? Ask them to stop burning and you might find something strange lurking behind you at night. ;)

I bought more tea today too, as well as a slab of Cadbury. Yes, slab. Not the little bar. Yes, slab. All for myself, hopefully. Ohyeahwoo... Cadbury. Yesterday I had a VERY bad chocolate addiction pang all of a sudden. Time to fulfill my desires. -_-

I was wondering if I should do a blogpost entirely on all the teas I've sampled so far. I love tea because its so diverse and I guess its healthier than coffee if taken moderately? I'm not sure, and also each tea has different effects on your body. I take chamomile for stomachache and if I want to get to sleep, and green tea is the MOST EFFECTIVE wake-up call I know. I drink peppermint if I have a blocked nose and etc. The healing power of nature. -_____-

Teavaluation. XD I don't know if I should do it cos it'll be very long, and probably no one will read it. But whatever, I need a diversion again. This time from Chemistry. I shall do it on Sunday, after I sample the three new types I purchased earlier- rose hip and hibiscus, lemon, blackcurrant.

Tense in more ways than one... =)

2008-08-14T13:31:00.004+08:00

I realised that I probably can't go into the service industry next time. I have a very low tolerance for Maths and accounting, especially. One mistake and everything is screwed up. I prefer working with and examining stuff that places more emphasis on the general outlook of things, like stories, drawings and essays, rather than things that are so detail-oriented like numbers and archives. Not to mention people-people interactions stress me out, unless they're one-to-one.

And also today while collecting money for the class photos, I realised that I get stressed out by the abovementioned details (and money) very easily. XD Definitely, if I went into accounting I'd commit suicide out of stress and mental distress. (I realised that stress and distress have somewhat similar meanings, yet they sound like antonyms. Something like 'septic' and 'aseptic/antiseptic'. Ya sorry for digressing.)

Luckily everyone (especially Joann, Shuqing, Weixin and alot more) was there to help with counting money and stuff, and managed to tolerate my crankiness while remaining calm themselves. Thanks guys. =D And THANK GOD Radiah is the class treasurer. I realised how hard her job is...... Sometimes I think that the treasurer is the most important person. Money is, after all, very important in 'today's modern world' anyway. (If I were a GP question, I'd continue with "What are your views?" or something. Sorry for digressing again. -___-)

But the Maths paper 1 we took just now was "Okay lah"... Not as hard as I had personally expected (which would've made it beyond A level standard, since I'm such a pessimist. =/) but still not easy. Its a very average paper with a rather nice mix of 'easy/seen' and 'difficult/wada e hell is this nongsensical crap' questions. I lost about 26 marks already but I should be able to pass. Must bang harder (XD) on paper 2. Statistics is my favourite part in Maths.

But for now, I should go consolidate my Bio stuff for tomorrow. I can't wait for the weekend, then I can take my time with Chem. One section a day! Physical, Organic then Inorganic. Woohoo. -_- The joy of not-so-speedy speedy revision.

"... kind of like starring in your very own Day After Tomorrow. LOL."
-Lakshmi Chaudhry

That's exactly how I feel now. =D But as usual, I shall pull through. For I am JC student, hear me MUG. -_- Wooah yeah, bring it!

Gaming Hiatus

2008-08-12T15:30:00.003+08:00

Yep.

Two reasons.

Firstly, because today was the first prelim paper. GP. I think it was quite okay, the passages were really cute. One of them ended with a 'LOL.' that nearly made me LOL halfway during the exam, cos it was so sudden. -_-

The compre passages were on Narcissism. Something I've seen in little little fragments in others, but never in its full-blown form. Thank God. But I don't know about myself so... Oh whatever.

Oh and I did the environment question for my compo. If I flunk this, I'll be sort of sad. The question was "Discuss the view that man does not have the will to deal with our environmental woes." or something to that effect. I won't bother telling you what my stance is cos you'll either fall asleep or try your absolute best to rebutt. Ask me personally, that way I can be sure that you're interested. =D

Okay... So yeah. Also, our computer broke down. I think there's some hardware problem, because that's what the com said. Most likely cos of the monitor, since everything else seems to be working fine. I'm not a comdoc though, so I won't care to hazard a guess.

Yep. I can still go online (as you can see) but I can't game cos all the games were on the desktop. No FT, no D2, no Sacred. Unless you want to play some Internet Explorer game or what. -_- I think the laptop can't handle more graphics-intensive stuff anyway. I did try the Spore Creature Creator on the laptop a few times but it crashed pretty often.

And yes, prelims. 'A' levels in 2 months. I should be studying Maths now. I've decided to leave my MSN on while studying though. So ya.

I hope the com doesn't get repaired until 'A' levels is over. That way I won't have to deal with mental battles of willpower anymore. The best way to get rid of problems is usually to stem them off at the source, and temptation is no exception. =P

National Day

2008-08-09T15:24:00.003+08:00

Its National Day, woo.

It just feels like any other day. =/ But I went to the temple today, to pray to my grandparents. We met up with all our family members and then we all went to offer joss-sticks and hell money to our paternal grandparents/parents/godparents/insert-relation-here. I was expecting the temple to be quiet and serene, with monks chanting, like it always is whenever we come on the 9th of August. But this year I think Hungry Ghost Festival was responsible for making it a noisy and chaotic place. Still, it was nice. I remember going to that temple at least yearly. A few years back, during my nature-hating phase, I cruelly threw stones into the terrapin pond, onto the terrapins. A few years after that, when my grandpa passed away, we went to the third floor where his urn was placed beside my grandma's. Last year we found a caterpillar. This year they added a little pond with tiny fish and a cute terrapin that pops its head up every few seconds and stares at you. I love terrapins. XD Oh and there was this really adorable black cat with nice (some would say demonic) yellow eyes. I wanted to pet it but it ran away. I scare animals. D=

And also while tossing hell notes into the burning thingy, I realised that fire really stings your flesh. It must be horrible to be burnt alive, probably one of the worst ways to die...

Yep. Then we went for lunch with our relatives. My parents had a minor quarrel in the car again, over parking spaces and one-way streets. -__- I swear, I don't know how those two ever got married... But I feel kind of bad whenever they quarrel. Its often really loud, too. When you're in the car, its utterly BLEH to have to listen to them, even if its over minor stuff and they usually don't mean it.

Uh huh. Oh and there was a horrible blackout yesterday. It was recurrent in fact. The first one came at about 10, and then there was a short pause where power was restored for awhile, before another blackout arrived at 11, then later AGAIN, at 12 or something. Could'nt sleep because no blackout=no fan or aircon=hot... I realised that electricity is VERY important, especially at night. Luckily I left a spare torch in my room, in case stuff like this happens. But its amazing how much I take electricity for granted. Okay, if it blacked out in the day I would still be ok, since I could always go to the balcony or something. But in the middle of the night, you NEED lights around, or at least some form of cooling device so that you can fall asleep. Either that or I guess our family (especially myself) is too pampered.

Not to mention its pretty creepy when your whole block blacks out. Total darkness. *ghostly mooooaaaannnnnn*

Bird-watching (on a pathetic scale)

2008-08-08T11:57:00.004+08:00

Note: Identification of the bird as a Spotted Dove was done with the aid of Wikipedia and Google. I still can't confirm it for sure, but it really does match the description. The bird's morphology is very much like the spotted dove's. The call does sound like how Wiki describes it, even the flight pattern. And most importantly, Spotted Doves can be found in Singapore. =P Spotted Doves flick their tails upwards when they land too, which is what I've noticed from the doves around my house. So its probably 99% likely to be a spotted dove.

Wikipedia Article

I love going outside.

Okay its not really outside. Its a balcony. -_- But you get sun, relatively fresh air (there's a forest nearby) and good photography opportunities. And there's plants. XD So there.

Today I saw something that's really quite bizzaire (make that amazing, since I'm still not sure how to spell that word. -_-) Anyway, my father keeps a spotted dove. Yeah, and there's alot of wild ones around our house. So today I saw one (I think it was a juvenile, due to the lack of the banding on its neck) that was sitting above my father's dove's cage. And when I got near it only flew onto a nearby aircon processing unit thing, still within my reach.

It was only until I tested its patience by stretching my camera forward when it relented and flew off into a nearby tree, way out of my measly human grasp. But not before I got some smashing pics. XD Well okay, taking pictures of 'dull-coloured' birds may not be worthy of 'smashing' to some people, but I certainly think its 'smashing'. Smashing is a fun word.

I love the wing feathers! Notice how it SITS on the railing, as though its very comfortable. I like it when birds do that, too bad parrots don't seem to make this a habit of their's, from my limited observations of them. They seem to prefer standing, unless they're taking a poo. =D

A few things to notice here. Firstly, the ant dangling precariously on the lid of the pitcher. Its the black dot on the pinkish leaf thing, yes. -_- I didn't put it there, I guess the nectar drew them there. I counted about 10 ants and a spider on the plant today. The spider looked VERY chio, but I could'nt get a pic of it cos the dang bugger was damn fast. Secondly, notice the older, dying pitcher in the background, compared to the newer, greener one which is the focus of this picture. Yep.
Lol, its a beauty. -_-
The view from my balcony, I guess. -_- The forest isn't in the shot but ya. It doesn't look very high class, and in fact the facade is rather mildewy from age, but this is my home. =) Its isolated, peaceful and relatively quiet. I enjoy it.

Anyway back to the bird. This isn't the first time I saw it around. That day I spotted it on the balcony ledge, calling out to my father's one with that plaintive call characteristic of their species. It can be best described as a coo-coo-coooo!-coo, with a huge emphasis on the third note and a very soft fourth note. And my father's bird was replying... It was really fantastic to just stand still and listen to them exchange calls with each other. I love how Spotted doves call, it sounds really melancholy and soothing.

Somehow I think they'd be a great couple, assuming that both of them are of different sex. I think I will try to convince my father to free his dove so that the other's love can finally be requited. Even if they're not of the same sex, I do think that there's alot of spotted doves around. I've seen up to three together on our balcony at any one time before. They love the bird food that sometimes gets scattered onto the ground from my father's bird cages. ;D

And also today I helped my father clean the birds' feeding and water trays a little. As smart as animals in Aves tend to be, you gotta admit that they're pretty unhygienic. They poo in their own drinking and food trays. So while scrubbing bird crap out of the trays (with my bare hands, no less), I was thinking about Pogey again...

More specifically, how he would say "HELLO" very loudly, everytime he saw someone picking up the phone. He's such a gem.

Too bad he's gone now.

Side note: One of the new pitchers has a rip in it. It'll probably die soon, which is VERY unfortunate because it just opened! The plant is otherwise healthy, though. Its so unfortunate that the pretty young pitchers are so damn fragile...

And yes, of course I wash my hands after cleaning the bird cages. -_- I like birds but not their poo, though its not as smelly as one might think. And the colour is quite nice actually. I'll stop now.

Superimposed on film

2008-08-06T12:10:00.003+08:00

I saw the class photos at concourse today. Some other classes did strange things, like one class all turned their backs on the photographer during the informal shot, and they flipped their ties over. I don't know what to say. -_-

My hair still looks strange in the photo. It REALLY doesn't look like me, even though it may look nicer and more stylish or something. Its amazing how much one's hairstyle can affect their entire image.

I miss my centerparting, its been with me forever. XD (I feel kind of squeamish whenever I think about this sentence.)

But oh well, I think I smiled better this time. I didn't expose my teeth for two shots, and when I did expose them for the other two, I thought of funny jokes so I guess it sort of looks more natural, not like...

(Maybe I should take a picture of my sarcastic 'ha-ha-that's-so-not-funny' smile, just to scare everyone. ;) I might do that later...)

And I managed to keep my hands on my lap, instead of gripping my left arm with my right hand. Finally. I look so porfehserner. -____-

Oh and I like S01's also. There's one where all the students were pointing to Mr Chai. XD I love that one alot because its very candid.

I wonder if we can buy other class' class photos. XD Cos I really wanna keep some- they do look rather unique and stuff.

I'll miss JJ, even though I'd gladly to leave some stuff behind. In general, its been a great 2 years and I feel much happier as a person than before I came in...

P.S. I looked in the pitcher plant's pitchers today. It caught some insects on its own, using its nectar. It made me happy. =) I'm such a sadist. *gasp* Oh dear. -_-

The hematologist

2008-08-04T13:10:00.003+08:00

Went to the hospital today. The haematologist did a simple examination, asking some questions like whether I had bloody urine and stuff like that. And they took two vials of blood for a blood test. Again, I wonder why my blood is so fluid. It seriously has the consistency (and perhaps to a small extent, the colour?) of Ribena... I doubt other people have such runny blood... And also I found it abit funny that the blood test hurts more than the blood donation. Most likely because they didn't use any anaesthetic for the former. When they pull the needle out you can seriously feel the metal brushing against your flesh. Ugh. Its like. Ugh.

Anyway it should be fine. But I'm still curious as to why my iron count is so low. (Its 8, my aunt says it should be above 10 to be considered acceptable.)

To be honest I think I have some sort of (non-sexual -_-) fetish for illnesses. I've ALWAYS wanted to get a fatal disease, or at least something that might or might not be fatal, like sickle-cell anaemia. Reading about these diseases in the Bio notes makes me very curious to experience how its like getting one of them... And if I have to die, so be it. It'll be my last learning experience.

Hopefully Heaven isn't reading my blog now. =/

Call me disgusting, morbid and inauspicious, but that's how I really feel. You'll never be able to truly understand how people suffering feel like, unless you suffer just as they do. If I get cured then all is well and I'd have survived a tough trial. If I don't then...... I guess people will mourn for me, hopefully. But like I said, I've already prepared myself.

I don't know why but these few days, I've been even more 'pessimistic' than usual. The thought of death keeps emerging in my head. It might be because I've been playing Qingpei's Trauma Center game too much. Seeing patients with life-threatening diseases (even virtual ones) really makes you think about the value of life.

Is dying really all that painful? Really, who hurts more, deep inside? The deceased or his/her loved ones? Is it even possible to quantify pain in tangible terms?

Pardon me for asking, but what would you do if you were going to die in the next twenty four hours?

Hope, Expectation and Acceptance.

2008-08-03T12:00:00.002+08:00

Just a few days ago, we did a GP passage on pessimism. I think its the PJC compre. The author's name is Meg something I think... Don't accuse me of having a poor memory, cos remembering her first name already quite pro. XD

Anyway, the author says that she's been labelled pessimistic before, but she finds that pessimism in some cases is good, because in visualising the worst-case scenario, and then not having it happen, one can often tide through crises easier.

This is in sharp contrast with optimism, where "one often hopes for the best, but then is disappointed when it doesn't come to pass." Obviously no one will always succeed. Optimism for me is only good if I'm VERY sure that I will excel at this certain task. Pessimism is reserved for things like Maths. XD

I've always considered myself someone who's half-half... I'm usually optimistic about certain things while pessimistic about others. But the times when I've been pessimistic, I realised that the author's philosophy holds true. For me, even if I do get upset, it doesn't last long and it often doesn't sting that much, cos I've sort of already prepared myself for the worst-case scenario.

Like that blood test.

I don't know if I'm ready to apply this to death yet, but so far I feel okay about dying. If I were to die tomorrow, so be it. I guess I'm selfish. And like Ms Lin said, people easily change in the face of pressure. I have no idea how well it would work out if I were staring Death down.

Garden Festival Photos!

2008-08-01T17:13:00.004+08:00

So, here are the photos as promised, from the Singapore Garden Festival. Many of them are over-exposed (sounds so wrong) XD ... Even if they weren't, they would hardly do the Garden Show half the justice it deserves. (Yeah I don't know why my phrasing is so odd.)

And also I ran out of batt halfway through, like I said yesterday. Sucks... There were alot more interesting things to take!

Anyway.

Yes, that guy is fake. -_-

This one is DEFINITELY my favourite photo of the lot. =P

Some kind of car. I think it cost alot or something. I wasn't paying attention to my aunt here cos I wasn't very interested. =X

I love this one. Its so surreal...

My aunt told me to take a pic of her with this exhibit, cos she said it was coincidental that she was wearing white and the exhibit was winter-themed. O_O

Danish (I think) exhibit on tulips.
This one is really fresh and edgy in my opinion. Its the acrylic sheets thing I was talking about yesterday. Ya I'm not using a multicoloured lens. -_-
Dunno what country but its cute. XD

Korean exhibit. I really like this one.
Part of an exhibit from India. It uses different colours in foliage to produce symbols representing the five elements (Fire, water, earth, air, metal I think? Forgot.)

Overexposed. I left my flash on by accident. Oh well. =/

Description of the 1st place winner (Titled "Shangri-La".)

1st place winner. Isn't it beautiful? Though it was far more so in real, because there was blue light and stuff... Looked very realistic!
I love the use of pitcher plants in "Shangri-La". My aunt in "Shangri-La".
Random shot
Some funny-looking human-flower hybrid. -_-

This is one of my favourites, a misty exhibit of my favourite genus of plants, Nepenthes! (Pitcher plants!!!)

My aunt tells me...... that the whole exhibit...

... consists of only ONE individual plant! It has like, at least 30 pitchers, and the entire plant must've been huge... Wow.

I like this flower. I think its from the Jasmine family? Saw it in Botanic Gardens before. The design of overlaying petals arranged in a star shape is highly attractive to me. XD
No idea what this flower/fruit/alien growth is, but it looks pretty fancy.
This is (part of) a flower, but ya I dunno what species. My aunt says its some kind of thistle I think.

Guess who?! Answer is below the last photo of this blogpost. And yes, this art piece consists entirely of live plants!

Just happened to see this bird perched outside the ladder on my balcony!

Super zoom-cropped shot. The eye looks pretty creepy, doesn't it? =P

The pitcher plant that my aunt bought! It looks so fancy...

This is an old pitcher. Its gonna die soon, but it'll be replaced by new ones!

Isn't the peristome (the 'rim' of the pitcher) nice? It reminds me of Maybelline lipstick. XD

Marylin Munroe will eat us all!

Garden Show

2008-07-31T21:18:00.002+08:00

Went to the Singapore Garden Festival at Suntec today with my aunt. Qingpei also went with her family, coincidentally. On the same day... Lol, coincidence. =P =P

It was a very FANtastic place... Man (in this case, 'man' is a general term. XDXD It can also refer to the ladies. Hehehe. If you don't get the joke then nevermind. Its an inside joke.) and Nature work together to craft something beautiful. There were alot of art installations with living plants in them, including one where the artist placed acrylic sheets at regular intervals, staining the flowers certain colours and stuff. Really beautiful place, its almost surreal in fact.

My favourite exhibit was the 1st place winner for 'Fantasy Gardens'. I'll show you guys the photo tomorrow, which by the way, hardly does justice to how awesome the exhibit really is... It depicts a future where humankind is long dead, and plants have evolved to survive underwater, amongst the inundated ruins of human cities. Morbid, but eyecatching at the same time. The tools that they used to create ripples and such were so bloody realistic, and they used the plants to great effect too.

Photos will come tomorrow. I took a fair bit, and I must say that I'm quite pleased with the results, given that both the camera and the photographer can hardly be considered state of the art. XD My aunt was always there to give advice, suggesting good angles and subject matter, cos this was her second time there. But unfortunately I ran out of battery. Should've heeded Byan's advice- always carry extras of everything with you, especially batteries and memory cards. Oh well, I managed to capture a fair bit of the exhibits still, though I did miss some really great stuff. Still, learning stuff the hard way is good sometimes, I guess.

And my auntie was very nice, she bought a pitcher plant for me!!! I would've preferred a venus flytrap, but those are really hard to take care of, and the pitcher plant we got still looks pretty cool, especially the rim of the pitchers. I hope it'll survive though, but I trust in plants and their hardiness. =P Though for someone who likes plants and animals alot, I honestly have black thumbs. Black for death... Usually with plants lah, for animals they run (OR FLY) away. =(

Yeah... Anyway I'm tired, gonna go sleep. I shall embrace the study break next week with a clear mind.

Oh and, she opened the NS letter. =P Cos she's the health conscious type, and she wanted to see what was wrong with me. Apparently all I have is Fe-deficiency anaemia... But I eat alot of meat AND veggies, especially stuff rich in iron like spinach. Hmm, I wonder why I was/am deficient... But ya, its not very serious... I'll survive, duh. XD

Craysay

2008-07-30T17:04:00.002+08:00

I did something foolhardy today. XD

We stayed back cos we had a dialogue session with our favourite man in JJ (Mr Koh), and also because we had to take 'official' class photos after the hall session. So, after school, Xueming suddenly called me then asked me to go toilet to style my hair. Then when I got there, they attacked my hair with wax. -_-

During the 5 or so minutes of phototaking, I realised that everyone looks so different, guys and girls alike... It really shows how much and how fast people can change their looks within such a short span of time. XD Experts.

Anyway, the result was some kind of side parting, emo-like thing that I felt looked very thick and old-ish... But then everyone said it was nice (or at least nicer), though I combed it back to a centerparting after the phototaking, using one nice hand movement. XD The advantages of having a centerparting include spending only 28 s a day combing your hair.

A centerparting may be ugly, but its what I'm used to... I'd hate to wake up one day and suddenly find myself looking totally different. (Even if I end up looking like Brad Pitt or whatever. -___-) I hate drastic changes to my looks, even if they're for the better... Maybe we can start something that's more progressive in the future, but I think I would die of shock if my hair suddenly turned spikey or whatever. Slow and steady wins the race, and all that jazz.

I have to admit that the wax smells nice though, and it didn't feel as sticky and disgusting as I thought it would... Wax is alot more comfortable than gel. And also its less 'hard'... Please don't generate any tiko thoughts. What I mean is that its less permanent and easier to restyle. Either that or it might've been as such because I left it on for only awhile. And also I've only used wax or gel only one time each. So I can't really judge, actually. But whatever, no one wants to listen to a rant on hair products. I bet you're starting to lose interest in my mundane life. I don't blame you. Ya so sad, I bet my hair is the purest in JJC, cos I only use water and my hands. -_-

Yeah and, like I said, we took class photos. I think I turned out like someone totally different with that hairstyle. Everyone said its nice (or okay, at least), yes, but, like alot of people said, it doesn't look like me at all. Its like plastic surgery without the surgery. Someone else is in those photos, standing in the place where I should be.

And personally I still think I looked quite weird with that hairstyle, since my hair was too thick for it... Though Samuel and Aaron and whoever else was involved did a good job cos its really hard to tame a centerparting. XDXD I've tried it before.

So ya I went to cut it after we finished taking the photos, to get the remainder of the wax out and also to trim it down a little since the weather these few days has been damn hot... I'm way overdue for a haircut anyway. I hate long hair though I think it looks better than short hair. Now I feel like a nerd, but I am my own nerd! And I'm a happy nerd. Zzz. And a warm nerd instead of a hot nerd. -___-

Look at my huge smile---> =D

I'm so sorry for scaring you with my oversmiling.

Bad pickup lines

2008-07-29T16:22:00.002+08:00

I've been hearing alot of bad pickup lines from different sources. None directed at me, obviously. -_- But some are quite interesting. And some are quite tiko. XD The rest are mostly drop-dead cheesy. If you don't feel like puking after reading this list, then I admire your sturdy constitution.

Warning: Somewhat objectionable content ahead. Nothing explicit, though!

1) Your father must be a terrorist, because you're the bomb!

2) You're like a hurricane- your eye is calm but you blow me away!

3) Are you tired? Because you've been running through my mind all day.

4) Call the police, because you stole my heart! (I think Yongjin invented this. -_-)

5) I'm sueing you because it must be illegal to be that pretty/handsome.

6) You're like a volcano. Sometimes you're explosive, sometimes you're more fluid, but you're always hot and ready to blow. (Yeah this one is probably the most perverted.)

7) Is it getting hot in here, or is it just you?

8) You're like an earthquake, you make me collapse with your Love waves. (Go wiki 'Love waves'.)

9) You're like a drought. (Too pervy to post.)

10) Am I dead, Angel? Cause this must be heaven!

11) Do you have a map? I keeping getting lost in your eyes!

12) Excuse me, but I think I dropped something!!! MY JAW!!

13) If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.

14) Was your father a thief? 'Cause someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.

15) Your name must be Mickey because you're so fine.

16) Ouch! My tooth hurts! Because you are soooo sweet!

17) Baby, if you were words on a page, you'd be what they call FINE PRINT!

18) You're like a dictionary, you add meaning to my life!

19) If you were a laser, you'd be set on "stunning".

20) Excuse me, do you have any raisins? How about a date?

21) Your lips must be cold. Let me warm them up for you.

22) I want to be DNA helicase, so that I can unzip your genes!

23) Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?

24) Sorry, I can't see clearly. The sparks between us are too bright.

And, finally (Not best for last though, since they all stink.)...

25) So, miracles do happen!

Lolol, these are some of the lamest ones I know. =P

Trauma Center

2008-07-28T19:13:00.004+08:00

Today I played with Qingpei's Nintendo DS in school. Three games.

The first was a rhythmic, dance-dance revolution sort of game where you're the drummer instead of the dancer. Pretty ok, but the hard difficulty is really, well, hard. -_- I have no idea what the game is called though, since the title is in Japanese. XD

The second isn't really a game but its more of a weight loss program. There's this really cute stickdude, and the animations are all done free-hand with pen on paper I think. Really nice, kiddy style. It wasn't really a game but it was enjoyable to watch the stickdude do stuff, like grow progressively fatter and thinner, and he's so cute when he laughs. =P

Cute eh? -_-

The third game was pretty fun. Its a hospital sim game, but you're not the management. Instead, you're a surgeon. Yep, its the only game out of the three which has a name that I can remember. Trauma Center. (There's a sequel btw. =P)

I think its set in the near future, since lasers and quick-heal antibiotic gels are widely used in surgery, and a genetically-engineered Guilt virus forms the central dogma of the storyline. Probably not too distant cos scalpels are still used. Anyway, its a fun game that requires quick thinking and steady fingers, mainly a test of your hand-eye coordination and, to a certain extent, your problem solving skills cos you have to decide which tool to use at which stage of the operation, which can get quite tough while you're under the pressure that many of the stages offer.

Its not very realistic though, because viruses aren't insectile in real-life (neither do they weave webs across your heart tissue...), and cytoplasm usually isn't green. And it probably isn't THAT easy to operate in real... Most levels have a time limit of around 5 minutes! But who cares about that? =P Its a game lolol. And a pretty fun one at that. Stressful at times, too, considering there's that bloody (no pun intended) time limit.

I haven't made it to this stage yet, but oh well. =P

-------------

Oh and Jiamin (from JJ, not QSS) told 2 cold jokes in class today. They're actually quite funny so ya. =P But they require some thought.

1) There are three tough guys working out in the gym.

One of them has a tattoo of a tiger on his chest. When he flexes his muscles, the tiger runs.

One of them has a dragon on his chest. When he flexes his muscles, the dragon flies.

The other one has a lion on his chest. When he flexes his muscles, the lion roars.

They see a scrawny guy in the corner, and they decide to pick on him.

"Hey, look at our tattoos!" says one.
"They're so realistic!" adds one of the other two.
"They show that we're the three most powerful guys in the gym!" the third guy concludes.

"Get out before we beat you up!"

The scrawny guy smiles confidently and takes off his shirt, revealing a tattoo of a coconut tree near his shoulder.

"You're all wrong, mine is the most realistic! It even has roots!"

-------------

2) What do nose-picking and dialing for pizza have in common?
6-2-3-5-3-5-3-5. (You need to think very hard for this one. Do the hand symbols for each number in order. =P)

DNAtube

2008-07-27T15:33:00.002+08:00

DNAtube rocks!

I think our Bio lecturer for Prokaryotic gene expression (Ms Wun?) introduced it to us. Its a website, obviously, and its name suggests that its similar to Youtube. Basically, all the videos there are on Biology-related topics. Yeah, computers aren't only gaming tools. I think we've all heard this a million times already, but you can easily use them for learning also.

I find it alot easier to study with visual aids. Words are fine, but personally I think its much more efficient if I see a video or something, because it helps me imagine what actually happens to the molecules/enzymes/whatever at the subatomic level, making it easier to organize my thoughts and pen them down. Sometimes if I read a chunk of text I'll imagine it differently from how it actually occurs in real-life, and I'll thus make a mistake when I'm describing the process again on my exam paper.

Yeah I'm making good progress with the Bio revision. Yay. I have less than 10 chapters left.

Too bad I still have to forsake my other subjects (especially Chem), because of poor time-management. Boo. I'm WAY behind on my Chem revision exercises.

And there's a Maths stats test on Thursday. Double boo. =P Stats is the part of Maths that I like the most, but still, I'd rather not have another test. >_<

Tropical Monsoon

2008-07-23T20:15:00.003+08:00

I absolutely love the weather these days. Its been so cooling, and its been boosting my mood alot. Hail the ITCZ.

Today I felt very tired though, but then the rain cures all. In the morning there was a warning on the news that there'd be heavy rain and strong gusts of wind... And just a few seconds after that, it started to drizzle, then pour. The wind was fantastic too, Qingpei said her umbrella inverted because of it. XD

And running down to get the attendance list and back up again is good for waking one up also. XD

Also, a side note. I realised how beautiful the Northern Lights (aka Aurora Borealis) are... To think its just some radiation reacting with ionized gas or something. You can wiki it if you're interested in pics and stuff... I'm a little lazy to put them in.

I would'nt mind dying in 2012 if the Earth's magnetic field reverses, especially if we all get to see auroras all over the world...

Heh. These few days I've been picturing the end of humanity... Its not because I'm murderous or something, but I'm just curious I guess. I've always wanted to know the destiny of our species.

Anyway, here are some theories. Just to exercise my brain a little cos I'm somewhat bored but don't really feel like gaming much:

1) Alien apocalypse kills most of the world's population. The remainder are kept as pets or in zoos, or dissected.
2) A supervirus or some sort of bacteria from space or created by genetic experiments infects and kills off humanity.
3) The Earth's magnetic field reverses. It happens about twice in a million years or something, but during the transition I think the field weakens greatly. This leaves us vulnerable to the radiation emitted by the sun and stuff like that. Listen to that flesh sizzle. Or the Earth's magnetic field could disappear completely. That would be even worse...
4) A huge solar storm shorts out all the world's power.
5) We die out cos the Earth becomes too polluted, and her biological systems can no longer support us.
6) Nuclear armageddon.
7) The world doesn't exist. Its just a figment of my imagination.
8) We devolve or evolve into something else. My personal favourite is worms. XD
9) In a few million years, another species would've evolved from something that's currently 'unintelligent' (let's say, ducks) and wipes us out somehow.
10) The Earth explodes due to a massive series of volcanic eruptions.
11) Global warming kills us off.
12) The sun dies. (So would we, after awhile.)
13) We consume all the world's resources and then we die out.
14) An ice age occurs.
15) Robot revolution kills us all.
16) World War III.
17) The human gene pool becomes irreversibly altered due to things like germ-line therapy and stuff. We eventually die out due to a high occurrence of genetic problems.

Here's the more silly ones. -_-

1) Dinosaurs return from space and kill us all. The aliens that abducted them finally released them back onto Earth or something.
2) Paris Hilton rules the Earth and forces everyone into servitude.
3) A reverse big-bang effect occurs, and we're all sucked back into the tiny little particle that caused all of it or whatever.
4) We get hit by a comet and then a few million years later, another sentient race will discover OUR fossils.
5) The Earth is hit by a giant object and shatters into two. We die. -_-
6) Someone gives a chimpanzee a nuclear bomb, just to see how smart they are. Of course, neither the chimp nor the person is very intelligent.
7) We move to the moon but forget that there's no air there. (Yeah I'm running out of ideas.)
8) Someone brainwashes us via television and we all turn into mindless zombies.
9) Suddenly, one day everything doesn't exist anymore. Oops.
10) Everyone becomes so happy and optimistic that we're always satisfied with our lives. No one bothers doing anything anymore and we die out cos we all stopped eating and stuff.
11) All the plate margins in the world turn into convergent margins and we're all sucked into the mantle. Hurray.
12) Everyone suddenly discovers how to do magic. Magi war erupts and we all die.
13) Everyone gets hooked onto online gaming and society stagnates. We eventually crumble into dust as a species because no one can be bothered to do anything, except game.
14) The planets align in a row and the combined force of their gravity pulls all of them into a single point of focus. (Maybe the sun?) The resulting impact from the colliding planets destroys our entire galaxy.
15) A black hole appears right beside Earth and we're all sphaghettified.
16) Over millions of years, plants have won the race of evolution and now they're at the top of the foodchain. Uh oh.
17) Someone creates a giant amoeba and it eats the world and grows progressively bigger, before going on to eat up stars, planets, galaxies, and eventually our entire plane of existence.

My personal favourite:
18) We dig tunnels underground in order to make room for more of the world's population. The Earth becomes so saturated with tunnels that the entire Earth's structural integrity is weakened. The Earth's lithiospheric crustal layout collapses and we all drown in magma.

Now for the more optimistic ones:

1) We colonize the entire galaxy or even the universe. Or even go to another universe.
2) We ascend onto a higher plane.
3) We become demi-Gods and start to create our own species and map out their evolution and stuff.
4) We manage to find a way to somehow make our civilisations sustainable.
5) Aliens ally with us and share their technology. We become their fwens and live happily ever after.
6) We create a virtual world in which everyone's mind is downloaded into. It works just like the real world, but our bodies in the real world stay in stasis as our minds explore the new virtual realm we've created. Since the world is virtual, everything is perfect and there's no war or famine or whatever.

High-larious

2008-07-22T15:31:00.004+08:00

Today was another high day. I think I'm going crazy cos I was laughing for more than 1/2 of the day...

It started during Maths, cos I was laughing at CERTAIN jokes that were told over MSN yesterday, but I was trying to keep it secret. XD But then Mr Chai saw my sneaky smiling.

Mr Chai: "Zhengwen, why you so happy, smiling until like that?"
Me: "Orh, nothing."
Mr Chai: "Is it because you won a date with Qingpei tonight?"
Me: "WHAT?!"

What the hell. -_- I dunno why everyone thinks we're together. Zzz.

THEN I was laughing during Chem again, cos of what Mr Chai said. And also because of those jokes that were told last night. XDXD

Mr Suren: "ZhengWen seems incredibly happy today."
*laughter in the background cos everyone remembered what happened during Maths*
Me: "... Again. -_-"

Then later during GP the whole class was laughing like siao. Cos Shuqing and Ms Lin sort of led to a hilarious conclusion type of thing.

Shuqing: "How to paraphrase revolving?"
Ms Lin: "Dunno." (Cos we're supposed to practice the summary by ourselves.)
Shuqing: "What's the difference between revolving and evolving?" (Evolving appeared in another part of the comprehension.)
Ms Lin: "They're very different leh."
Shuqing: "Pokemon is evolve or revolve?"

Yeah, so random. XD So I laughed like crazy.

My mouth hurts now. =(

Oh yeah, and we celebrated Wenjie's and Vimal's birthday in the canteen.

Wenjie kept opening his birthday card cos it was the musical kind, and the song kept playing whenever he opened it. XD

And he always opens it for like 2 seconds.

So its like:
Dun ne ne-
Dun ne ne-
Dun ne ne-

-__________- Wenjie we should've bought you a silent card man, like Vimal's.

And also the Mango Mousse cake from Han's is really nice. Just a sidenote. XD

LOI

2008-07-21T14:05:00.005+08:00

I went to CMPB again today, so I skipped school.

But it was a rather crap trip. Firstly because I went to collect my LOI, which stands for 'Letter of Identity' and not 'Letter of Induction' or whatever... Apparently I have to visit NUH on the 4th of August for a follow-up on my Medical Checkup with a HAEMATOLOGIST. And I've been shifted to PES D temporarily, until they get the results of my checkup. And yes, the LOI is basically a payment letter for consultation and examination, but not medication and treatment. I just realised that 'LOI' looks alot like 'LOL'. -_-

But shit, what the heck is wrong with my blood?!?!? I hope its fine lor. They also gave some forms and a sealed letter directed to the Haematologist which I'm supposed to hand him/her. But then its like... I'm not supposed to open it, I think. So I'll be kept in suspense til 4th August. I hope its nothing serious, but I've already sort of mentally prepared myself already. Honestly I think that, if the worst-case scenario arrives, I would'nt mind, especially if my passing is peaceful and quick. I've already seen enough of the world, its really sufficient.

Though seeing more would'nt hurt, of course. =/ Honestly, I don't feel very worried... But I bet I will grow more and more nervous as the checkup date approaches.

It might just be some minor disease or what. Or maybe they Polymerase Chain Reaction'd it or something in the lab, then got problem. XD No idea.

Anyway, on about less morbid matters. I also stupidly lost my key to the locker which you're supposed to keep your phone in. (Since cam-phones aren't allowed in CMPB.) So paiseh, I had to like go into some office on the third floor filled with people and ask around for a lady who had my key... Ugh, I'm so careless.
-_-

And now I'm still wondering if the replacement key I received was:

a) A copy of the one I lost.
b) The original, which the lady had somehow stumbled upon on the ground or something.

I can't be sure cos it looked the same as the original... I have no idea why I'm wondering anyway. XD

Ya but in the end I got my phone back, though not my ego. -_-

Yes so. That's all lor. Other than that, I'm making somewhat good progress with my Chem exercises. Finishing the Chem Bonding one soon, before doing Geog maybe, and then finally indulging in some gaming. D2 own. =D

Falked Day, Falked Paper.

2008-07-18T18:39:00.003+08:00

Only one word can describe today: "Falked".

Its a substitute for a certain popular swear word. -_- I'm gonna keep up my 'no swearing on this blog' policy...

Yep... So today right... It was like, alot of people were telling cold jokes for the whole day. XD

~~~~~~

Ms Loh
"There was a man with pronounciation problems. He was an engineer in a major project. So he said, 'For this project, we need 500 tonnes of SEMEN.' And then everyone laughed... They were wondering why he needed so much semen for the project."

Background behind the joke: Cement=Semen. You do the math.

Verdict: Ms Loh is very good at telling jokes, even though she hardly does so. XD The joke may not seem very funny at first, but Ms Loh has the ability to keep a straight face and talk in a very calm manner while telling jokes. It makes them very funny even when they're not necessarily so! That's good, considering we usually need a joke during Bio tutorial. Sigh.

~~~~~

Wenjie
"Why is Wenjie funny?

... Cos he's a joke!"

---------------------------

"A crab walks sideways on the beach right? How does it walk in the human body?

... In a cycle!"

--------------------------

"Two men were conversing.

Man A: Yesterday, Emma came. Then I came. Then two asses came. Then I came again. Then the two asses came again. And I came again, then peed twice, before coming yet again.

Man B: How can you talk about your sex life in public like that?!

Man A: I'm not... I was spelling 'Mississippi'!"

Background behind the jokes: The first one is pretty self-explanatory. Second is a reference to Kreb's cycle... (Kreb is a pun on Crab...) Its a respiratory, cyclic series of reactions that occurs in our body's cells. Bio stuff. XD Third one is pretty obvious. Look at how the letters are arranged in 'Mississippi'...

Verdict: Wenjie is the master of cold jokes. Sometimes he's good. Other times...... But I guess everyone has their own take on humour. Sometimes I don't find myself funny but everyone laughs. -.-

~~~~~

Me
"Falked particle!"

Background: There's something in Bio called a 'stalked particle'... Yeah. -_- Play on words. By the way, the word 'falk' orginated in an MSN conversation. I think it was initially a typo of 'talk' but then Mrs Ninomiya and I realised that it was a good substitute for the swear word. XD

Verdict: Its not really a joke, but yeah, it is cold. -_-

~~~~~

Mrs Ninomiya
"Falking paper. Falked paper...

... The paper that falked!"

Background: More falkedness. -_- As Mrs Ninomiya so aptly phrased it, "Imagine a paper growing something, and then... Um... Yeah."

Verdict: XD

~~~~~

I might create a blog post just for cold jokes whenever I hear some good ones. -_-

So, amid all that forced laughter and piercing coldness, you're probably wondering where the 'falked' part is gonna come in. Other than with those last two 'jokes'...

Here it is: I'm gonna fail my Maths Mock Prelim. ;)

Pointlessness

2008-07-13T18:44:00.004+08:00

Rarr.

Today I drank four cups of green tea. XD All using one teabag. I'm super sheng. -_-

Finished studying Bio, and finished most of the homework (except for Chem)... I'm going to start Maths tomorrow onwards. Intensive, 1-book-a-day revision for Maths. No gaming. =/

I think I won't be able to fall asleep later... Caffeine overload.

Yeah that's all. Nowadays its pretty much all the same thing. Nothing much to blog about... Maybe this post didn't even need to be written.

But I already wrote it. Too bad. XD Sorry for wasting 30 seconds to 1 minute of your life.

Or however long you took to read it.

I like The Natural Confectionery Company's stuff. Even I personally think though they use alot of sugar. =/

Digression about gaming

2008-07-12T18:12:00.004+08:00

I gave up on writing the book... So far, only a small part of Chapter 1, and the Background and the Prologue are completed. Yet I feel no more motivation to carry on. Somehow I ran out of the drive I needed to complete it... Not to mention that life is getting busier...

Though I've been having my fair share of fun, still.

Been playing Diablo II recently... I should stop soon, I think. But for now... Assasin rocks. XD Dragon Tail totally owns, and the attack speed is breakneck. Tiger Claw is also fantastic and imbalanced. Greattt... Rarrr, its stress-relieving to bash up monsters.

I know Diablo III is coming out soon, but I bet it'll be very expensive so I'm probably not going to buy it... I'd rather get Spore first. SPOREEEEE. =D

The D3 graphics seem really nice (and probably lag-inducing) though, and I like how the Witch Doctor twitches. XD Plus his spells, of course... Ya I'm sick, going for some skinny twitching freako... We'll see how the storyline comes along, though.

Also, I've been playing Warcraft alot recently... With two different groups of people. Its becoming harder to manage what little game time I have and divide it evenly between games, school and people, but I think I'm doing well so far.

But no... I've not been slacking either, mind you. So far I'm at least on schedule for all my work... But JC students have gotta rest too.

I don't feel stressed. Ha. Mind over matterrrr.

Rain x3

2008-07-11T14:17:00.004+08:00

Its been raining alot lately... I think morning assembly was cancelled three days in a row due to bad weather. The rain is always there for us when we need it. Except during NAPFA. -.-

Bad weather is great! (Revel in the paradox.)

Cooling, no assembly, and its interesting to watch rain falling and trickling away. Its great respite from the tropical heat. Bless the Asian monsoon and the ITCZ for this. But curse them for being part of the Geog syllabus. -_-

Ha, next week will be killer. Alot of work to do, and there's some more tests to boot, after the mid-years. Woohoo.

Speaking of mid-years, we'll also be getting our Bio back on Monday. I hope I did well... Chem and Maths were pretty frown-worthy.

Side note (which is even longer than the main topic) : I'm making good progress while saving for Spore. (The videogame, out in September but I most likely can only start playing it in late November.) Saved about 36 bucks this week. XD Mainly because my father keeps giving me money... Even when I don't really need it. Once I asked him why he did this, but then he just walked away. Probably because I was asking really softly, as usual. -_-

But I did try to scrimp also... Sort of. XD Except for the huge amount I spent on snacks today... But there was something that looked abit like Jagabee, and it was damn tasty. Definitely worth it. XD The flavour is... creative... I can't read Japanese and I didn't want to bother Qingpei, but based on the taste and the drawings on the packaging, I think that its kumquat and pepper flavoured or something. Nicer than it sounds... Tangy, with a hint of mild spicyness.

Its this sort of delectable little treat that prevents me from saving... Some people splurge on loved ones, some blow it all on clothes, some indulge in going around town and I guess there's a few who have a taste for gourmet, high-class (and highly-priced) meals...

... I buy candy and snacks. XD

I think I should cut down... Imagine how much I would save! But too bad, my tongue craves for more and more. I gobble sweets and tidbits like how a whale would swallow schools of plankton.

Except that the whale gets his or her plankton for free, and I have to invest a large sum of my allowance in satisfiying my sweet tooth.

Basically, I'm guilty of being lousy with money.

Another moodswingey day

2008-07-10T15:07:00.005+08:00

I was angry in the morning, but then it rained and I felt better. I realised that Geetha is right, sort of. Anger is good also though, because it sort of empowers me for some reason, but its unecessary sometimes. Its nice to stare at falling raindrops. They're almost mesmerizing...

Anyway.

Today's (That subject) lecture was hilarious. XD

Cos it was 2 hours long, so someone was watching something on a handphone... Then the lecturer noticed so the lecturer went to ask the person to show everyone. XD

Basically its some tiko video... No nudity or anything but its sort of dirty humour. XD I'll spare you guys the details.

Then the whole LT laughed. It was hailarious. (Ya I spelt it wrongly on purpose.)

First time I laughed until I cried, in a long while. Thanks, mysterious person, for watching such things! =P

Ya I censored everyone's names and the subject... But ya, everyone who was in the (that subject) lecture just now should know who they are... Damn funny lah... Oh my God I'm still laughing. XD

Meme 2

2008-07-09T15:52:00.003+08:00

Meh... I guess I'll do the Meme on Jin's blog then... =/ Since my name is there.

I should really be doing my Bio stuff on Photosynthesis, but oh well. XD

1. The person who last tagged you is: Byan

2. Your relationship with him/her is: Sec sch friends

3. Your five impression of him/her: Contemplative, Quiet, Random, Adaptable, Considerate.

4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you: Er... Going out to take photos after 2 years of not seeing each other face-to-face. XD

5. The most memorable thing he/she had said to you: "Gwen!"

6.If he/she become your lover, you will: Ya I won't even bother filling this up.

7. If he/she become your lover, thing he/she has to improve on will be:

8. If he/she become your enemy, you will: Be very sad. As with everyone else.

9. If he/she become your enemy, the reason will be: Most probably my oversensitivity or paranoia's doing.

10. The most desire thing you want to do for him/her now is: Err... I have no idea. =/ Whatever he wants. XD

11. Your overall impression of him/her is: He's quiet, but so am I. -_- But he's a nice guy so yeah.

12. How you think people around you will feel about you?: Everyone always says I'm smart, childish, emotional, sensitive and introverted. Standard answer... I disagree with the first part.

13. The characters you love of yourself are: Oversensitivity, helpfulness (mostly), responsibility, being introverted (sometimes), idealism.

14. On the contrary, the characters you hate yourself are: Being hypocritical, being introverted (sometimes), a characteristic lack of confidence. Oh, and sometimes I'm also unable to control my negative emotions.

15. The most ideal person you want to be is: Someone who has no flaws. Ha. That's why its an ideal, and it'll always stay that way.

16. For people that care and like you, say something to them: Thank you for tolerating my nongggggsense. XD

17. Pass this quiz to 10 persons that you wished to know how they feel about you (I'll just grab 10 completely random people... You guys don't have to do the quiz, so yeah... I just need some people for the next part. XD)
1. Joseph
2. Wenjie
3. Mark
4. Radiah
5. Geetha
6. Qing Pei
7. Byan
8. Hermes
9. Arthur
10. Xue Ming

18. Who is no.6 having relationship with? Ninomiya. XD

19. Is no.9 a male or female? Male.

20. If no.7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing? I have no idea... Most likely it'll be a quiet encounter... But probably still okay.

22. What is no.2 studying about? Probably everything from H2 Chem to H2 Maths to H2 etc etc... In his pungent room. XD

23. When was the last time you had a chat with no.3? Hmm... Pretty long ago.

24. What kind of music band does no.8 like? Super Junior, Jay Chou. -_-

25. Does no.1 have any siblings? 4 brothers I think...

26. Will you woo no.3? Ugh. -_-

27. How about no.5? LOL... Probably not... But then I would'nt woo anyone at this point in my life. Hopefully for the rest of my life too.

28. Is no.4 single? Yes. XD

29. What is the surname of no.5? Wow good question... I don't know. O_O Sorry Geetha...

30. What 's the hobby of no.4? Surfing Youtube, reading, composing songs and writing.

31. Does no.5 and 9 get along well? They've never met.

32. Where is no.2 studying at? I forgot how that cheer goes... In the Western part of Singapore... There's a place to be... Where we train to be sexy... That's JJC! (Echo: That's JJC!) -_-

33. Talk something casually about no.1: He's good at art I guess.

34. Have you tried developing feelings for no.8? HAHA. No. Fullstop.

35. Where does no.9 live at? No idea. =/

36. What colour does no.4 like? Jeez I have no idea... I think I don't know my friends as well as I previously thought I did.

37. Are no.5 and 1 best friends? They don't know each other. XD

38. Does no.7 like no.2? Damn. -_- I think I'm bad at assigning the numbers... All the odd pairings... =/ All haven't even met each other.

39. How do you get to know no.2? Classmates. =)

40. Does no.1 have any pets? His brother has cute hamsters.

41. Is no.7 the sexiest person in the world? Wth... No comments. =/

Ya... You guys don't have to do the quiz. Like I said, just selecting random people to use in it. =/ Now I feel pretty stupid cos most of the questions were answered retardedly. *sighhhh*

Botanic Gardens

2008-07-08T18:51:00.003+08:00

Here's the pictures from yesterday's trip to Botanic Gardens with Byan. It was only a 1 hour long trip, since Byan had lessons at 11 and we met up at 9. -_- But I think it was rather fruitful nonetheless, if a little bit rushed.

I removed the captions and titles, but I did leave comments for some pictures. Mostly about the technical stuff or what I did to the photo, though, if any. I didn't edit any of them, except those that are marked as being zoom-cropped or whatever. So, enjoy. ;)

Sorry if its blur. I blame both my camera and myself... My cam is easy to use for me, but then again it often blurs stuff up.

Also, as a sidenote, Geetha's and MR NAI Wenjie's blogs are up and running. XD (In WJ's case it had to be revived...) So visit them if you want, I guess...

(I'm extremely proud of this pic, though honestly I did use my camera to zoom-crop it. I could never zoom so intensively with my camera alone...)

(I like this too, even though I obviously didn't carve the statue. XD)

(Note: For this, and the other lotus shots, I had to stretch out my hands and balance myself precariously at the edge of the ponds to get the shots. So I risked alot! XD The cam's zoom is very limited. =P)

(I know its a little blur ok. Pardon me and my shaky hands. I think Byan snapped a steadier pic of this.)

(I covered the flash bulb with my hand cos I could'nt figure out how to turn off flash for a moment there. XD This gave the reddish effect shown here. Neat huh? It wasn't edited at all. Talk about tikam. -_-)

(Might be a little too bright...)
(Same... Too bright perhaps.)
(Super macro shot. I cheated, I zoom-cropped the pic using my camera's editing tools.)

(Blur... I must keep my hand steady next time.)
(Shot this guy covertly. XD Yeah I know that has a double meaning.)

(The guy didn't look very happy when he realised I was taking a pic of him... =/)
(One of my favourites from this trip.)

(Spot the squirrel!)

(Another harder 'Spot the Squirrel')

Fusion Shots

2008-07-07T11:19:00.004+08:00

So yep. Remember that trip to City Hall I was detailing yesterday? Here's the result. Nature+Urban=Fine Living. XD Byan helped me with quite a few, either by pointing out suitable subjects or suggesting the correct camera settings to use. So ya thanks man. XD

There'll still be captions, it just feels weird not naming your photos... So ya.

Tomorrow, I'll blog about today's trip to Botanic Gardens. I would'nt wanna overwhelm you guys, now would I? =P So I'll take it a step backwards. Or forwards. Or whatever lor. -_-

Spectral Bridge

Dust in the wind

Drown

Life vs Light

Decay
Plantlet!
Welcoming
Late
Extremophilic

All that withers is not gold
Collapse
Juxtapose
Deception
Radian

Edge
Chrysalis
Nibble
Congested
An alternate perspective

Fissure
Autumn Monsoon
Stages
Eclipse
Angles

Triumph
Patience
Senescence
Stranded (There's a little tiny spider on that petal, if you can see it. =P)
Gush

Autumn Monsoon #2
Waterfall
Ice Sculpture
Chew
Rainbow Rock (Thanks Byan!)

Squatters
Unrequited Love
Torrent
A delicate compliment
(Don't you just hate seeing stuff like this?)

Deathbed of Steel
Taste nectar
Torn
Path to Uncertainty
Shadowcast

What am I? (No really, I forgot what it was. -_-)
Life on the Edge
Pampered
Corkscrew

Tunisia
If only it could scratch you back. =)
Illuminated
Nuff' said... (No offense to smokers.)
Bell shower

Gentrify
Repeat ends
Suggestive
Separate Paths

Sun Dust
Splotched
Architectural Overlay (Thanks again Byan)
Moon Curtain
Kids these days... (Though I'm still partly a kid. -_-)

Resistance to Time
Seventh Heaven
Runic
The Durian (You should know which durian...)
Heiroglyphics (Thanks again Byan. XD)

Everything dies in the end... (Bird feather and withered petals.)
Feast (Sorry for scaring you Qingpei. XD)
Palmyra
Golden Glow
Plasticine

Rabbit's Blessing
Trapped!
Domo-kun! XD
I etch my love...
Okay I take no credit for writing this... But I think the handwriting is spectacular and really Gothic-like, so I could'nt resist taking a shot of it. ;) Same with the other graffiti shots above, just to clear that up!

Spokes
Parallel Universe
A split in the path
Follow me
Well-travelled

Pseudo-Scorpion
Tinkerbell
Flame
Greedy!
As thin as paper

Chaotic
An Urban Jungle
Upwards Appeal
Through these halls

To the Gallows

A strange day

2008-07-06T16:30:00.005+08:00

Today was a strange day...

Imagination:

It started off with a mildly random dream...

I was at an MRT station, judging by the design it looked like Lakeside. I was preparing to cross the street even though there were no traffic lights and such, and it was a very busy road with lots of cars zooming past.

So I suddenly noticed that three skinny guys were like, snatching an old purse from a 50+ year old taitai-looking woman, across the street. I hesitated because, firstly let's face it. I can be cowardly at times. Secondly the traffic was pretty heavy so I was reluctant to cross.

Yep. Then suddenly a guy stopped over in a reddish-looking car, just as the muggers had grabbed the purse and were taking off with it. He said nothing, but gestured in an animated and anxious manner for me to chase the thieves.

I don't know why, but I did... They ran into some control room in the MRT station... The sort with the lightning bolt on the door, and they say something like 'For Personnel Only'. They grabbed a man and a lady from amongst the passersby and dragged them in too. The police appeared out of nowhere (?? I think they were hiding behind bushes and stuff, and happened to be there, ready to pounce) and then held guns out as a warning. The robbers fired a ray of brilliant red light from a laser-like device one of them held. It was like some sort of pistol-sized laser that was silver, with a tube of red liquid. Suppose that's the ammo? Ya so part of the wall became scorched when the beam hit it.

Yep. Then the police suddenly jumped back into their hiding spots and disappeared. I have no idea why, but at this point I was torn between 1) barging in and rescuing the hostages, running away like a turkey and 3) hiding behind a desk (?!?) that was near the place where they kept the hostages.

I opted for the third option, even though I'd never do something so foolhardy IRL, especially if the guy had a laser. So since the police were gone, the guy came out to search around for some reason. I was shivering behind the table that seperated me from life and death. So the robber found me. He was like peeking through a gap in the side. Then he went like "Heh heh heh." and grabbed me, poking my back with the laser.

I was a hostage.

Then, anticlimatically, the dream ended and I woke up with a horrible start. About half an hour before I had to leave the house.

Yep. Pretty disturbing dream, but definitely not the worst I've had.

Reality:

So after that, I changed and left the house to go meet Byan. I saw a guy in the lift who had taken it downwards (from 6th floor or whatever), and I wanted to get off at the second floor la. Ya then at the second floor, when the door opened, there was this cute cat there. It stared at both of us for awhile, as if considering whether to run into the lift or not. In the end it ran to the guy's side. I looked at him with uncertainty.

"Its okay, we're going first floor." He smiled.

I was like "O_O Okay..."

Pretty funny. The cat was rather intelligent. I've never seen a cat wait for a lift before!

Yep. Then I walked towards the place where the shuttle bus out of my condo parks itself. I parked myself on one of the seats. There was a strange buzzing noise, reminescent of a bee. I looked back and there really was a bee INSIDE the bus, charging relentlessly against the window every few seconds as though it could just break through the glass and get out of the confines of the bus.

So part of me was obviously afraid of being stung. And I sort of was hoping for the bee to fly out. I mean the poor thing... Ya...

So in the end it landed just behind me. I took a picture of it.

It has a nice abdomen, I've never seen bees with green/black abdomens before!

I must've looked pretty crazy cos as you can see in the photo, there's some little pole thing partitioning the windows for each row of seats. It just so happened to be blocking the bee. So anyone sitting behind me would've seen me taking a photo of nothing. -_-

Ya but that wasn't the weirdest part...

I looked back again cos I heard more buzzing even though my friend the bee had landed just behind my shoulder. True enough, I saw another bee.

But looking through the back window of the bus, I also saw some large catlike creature.

I swear I'm not lying. I really saw like, a huge cat. Maybe its the size of a Husky (breed of dog)... DEFINITELY NOT a specimen of Felis domesticus. It was definitely catlike though, because its gait was more feline (slinky and walking with one leg directly in front of the other) as opposed to canine (more animated and free-spirited) and so was its tail, which was long, swishing forward and back like a walking feline's (sort of like how house cats with long tails walk.) And its colouration was pretty feline too, cos it was like tan, slightly dark brown at some parts. Looked like a suntanned lion. XD Without a mane though.

I could'nt get a good view of it though. It might've been just a large dog. But then again... O_O

Strange enough, some guy went close to it and was like, poking it or something. It didn't seem to mind though.

I was like thinking... "Wth?! Singapore got such big cats? Should I go see? Some more its near my house there leh! I won't get another chance like that one hor... But then the bus is leaving soon..."

Then after a few minutes of consideration, I got off the bus la. Since it was scheduled to leave in 5 mins anyway. That gave me 4min 30s to check the cat out. And guess what? The cat disappeared. I don't know where it went... I don't even know if I was hallucinating. Woohoo, crazy day. =/

Anyway about my outing with Byan. Photos will be out tomorrow since this blogpost is already congested enough. Going out with Byan again tomorrow, so I might even compile like, a 100 photo blogpost. XD See how much I can take tomorrow at my favourite spot (Botanic Gardens!) lor...

Musical wants

2008-07-05T12:15:00.006+08:00

I've decided that I'll probably never need an MP3, iPod or any other similar device which plays music. Apart from saving money (so that I can blow it on other material wants, of course!), there's another very important reason...

Okay this might sound weird, and I might even be the only one you know who does it (not likely, though), but when I'm bored (usually on a long ride) I'll sort of cook up a tune in my head. =P Its either self-made (usually crappy) or, more often, one that I've heard somewhere...

Fergalicious is a song that I often 'cook up'. XD Burn me at the stake for being 'mainstream', but I like the starting sequence in Fergalicious...

The one that's like. Dun. Dun dun dun dun dun. Dun! DUN!

Ya you probably can't decipher that. Its okay, neither can I. -_-

Yep... It'll most likely start with a beat, then I'll imagine the singer's voice being thrown into the fray, along with other instrumentals and stuff like that.

I call this phenomenon...

MIND MUSIC!!!

And it made me wonder... Would'nt it be great if someone invented an instrument that could pick up BRAINWAVES, and translate them into sound? That way, people like me who are untalented at playing instruments can actually have a go at making some music. Of course, it would probably spark off a whole debate about how such people are actually talentless and are not as good as the 'true musicians'...

Not to mention it would be embarrassing if you were currently preoccupied with dirty thoughts and your instrument screamed 'WOOHOOOOOO WOOO WOOOO WOOO' in front of a million people on national TV. =D

I think I saw Jimmy, Sheen and Carl use such instruments in "The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron" before... Ya I watch cartoons, if you didn't already know then you probably know alot less about me than you think. =D

Anyway this practice of imagining up some good mind music has saved me a bundle, I guess... Its almost as good as the real thing, except without the embarrassment of you singing out loud on the bus without even realising it. XD Or blasting music unnecessarily and annoying people like me, who want to keep their own mind music to themselves and would benefit from a lack of external interference... I say this again: "Stupid blasters."

Ya like I said though, I completely doubt I'm the only one who engages in this practice. And of course, the real thing (MP3 players and the works) will most likely always be better when it comes to quality and accuracy, though mind music is already good enough for my standards.

I think my thoughts are taking over my life. =(

To quote Byan:

"Not like its a bad thing."

Pangolin

2008-07-04T17:55:00.015+08:00

This is gonna be random but, I love Pangolins. =P

Here's a video on Pangolins!

Look how damn cute they are, seriously! =P They walk bipedally... Which is actually pretty surprising. I used to think they walked on all fours...

Kingdom Animalia rocks. XD So many weird creatures, each of them with their own eccentric charms...

And I also love carnivorous plants a whole lot. =P My favourite is the venus flytrap... I like how it closes its trap...

*hintcoughbirthdaypresentplease* Micropropagation has made selling and growing plants alot more convenient, so take advantage of it and get me a venus flytrap plantlet for my birthday. XD

No la just kidding, but I'd really love to see a real venus flytrap one day...

Footage on some carnivorous plants, presented by David Attenborough! I always love watching him on Animal Planet. I think he's really good at making the audience fascinated in the animal or plant being focused on... Something about his voice that's engaging and lively...

Venus flytraps, sundews and pitcher plants, among others, have definitely gained my admiration. I'd love to keep something that defies the conventional order of the food chain around the house...

In a somewhat unrelated incident, I remember how I once had a tiny yellow spider, only about the size of a pinhead, living in a web she made within the foliage of Leafy, my money plant. =P I named her Flo and I used to feed her ants daily. Was fun to watch her detect the vibrations in her web, then move in for the kill, and deal the coup de grâce with a well-planned, paralyzing bite. Mind you, she's about half to three-quarters the size of an ant. Not bad for a tiny yellow spider. Okay she has venom on her side, but I'm biased. XD

Of course, Flo's now gone. She disappeared one day, no suprise since she's so damn tiny and I think spiders have rather short lifespans. But she was really fun to have around and I guess I was being a little sadistic with the ants, but it was fascinating to watch her while she was here...

Ya okay. XD I'm just in a totally random mood today.

This morning I was apprehensive and sad about the Maths test results.
Then later I was angry for no apparent reason.
This was followed by happiness and randomness, lasting up till now. =P

I think chocolate and laughing are both extremely therapeutic for sadness, at least for me. XD Thanks everyone, lolol. Especially Wenjie with his innuendo hijinks. >=D

First time I've had such a menstrual-hormonal-moodswing type of day. -_- But it was pretty fun, if not exhausting.

Maths is Blue

2008-07-03T17:12:00.002+08:00

I'm extremely disappointed now. I don't know who to blame, but I think its obviously my fault lor.

Yes, after several A grades, I failed Maths again... I passed my other common tests (not sure for Bio/Chem but they should be passes) but only Maths failed. -_-

Okay its a bloc test, but still...

Hai... I realised that shooting stardom is only temporary. I think I'm better at those Statistical Maths topics, that's probably why... Complex Numbers is quite tough for me.

And also my GP... I nearly failed, and I got 57 1/2. Its actually a good mark if you compare it with the rest of the level, but I have my own standards for most subjects... I'm rather disappointed cos I was hoping for a C at least. You need B to get into courses like English Literature so I'd rather aim for a B in the A's. I might not even end up taking Communications Studies or English Lit or whatever, but it never hurts to aim as if one would.

I'll never be satisfied by this empty paper chase. But there are other things in life that bring us joy. I'm just glad that, even though my happiness never lasts long when it comes, my sadness is often short-lived as well.

New layout

2008-07-02T20:05:00.003+08:00

New layout. Some might think it sucks, or its too complicated, but I like it. =P

Blue will be nice for a change. Thanks to Arthur, Qingpei, Xueming for providing mental relief and HTML help. XD

I'm sorry if I missed out your name in the 'Links' session. Please don't hesitate to notify me if I did, though I believe I got everyone...

Photo slideshow...

2008-07-01T21:58:00.007+08:00

Photo slideshow will be up soon... I'm still experimenting with it, so ya... Anyway it'll be a very huge slideshow with, maybe about 40-60 photos? So yep.

Life hasn't been particularly interesting nowadays. Its business as usual. But now, with the less-restrictive timetable, I feel so much more liberated...

I'm in control, baby! ;)

-_- Ya sorry for being so gross, but this feels wonderful. I feel as though there's all the time in the world. The workload is huge, yes, but I think we can all make it. I don't know why I'm so optimistic... =P

Yeah I finished writing the Backstory and Prologue for that book I'm planning. I like the Prologue alot more than the Backstory. XD I doubt it'll get published but yeah. First attempt. I think even if only me and my friends read it (or, heaven forbid, even if its only me...), it'll still be good exposure. I'm probably going to be a writer when I get a job. I realised that my drive to teach was only short-lived... I'm so fickle, what a curse.

Anyhoo, Chapter 1 will be written tomorrow... I don't know if this will turn out to be the best thing in my life, or a total confidence-crushing nightmare, but we'll see... The only thing certain about life is uncertainty. XD

Edit: I give up on the slideshow, for now at least... I think I need assistance on how to use the Blogger slideshow tool properly. Ugh. -_- At least I learnt something: Photobucket Slideshows suck for Blogger.